


Casual Affair

by LTiger (Lazarusmycroft)



Category: MorMor - Fandom, Sherlock (TV)
Genre: Blood, Explicit Language, M/M, Mind Games, Multi, Other, Sex, Violence, angst angst angst, it's MorMor what do you expect
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-01-26
Updated: 2015-04-08
Packaged: 2018-03-09 04:35:44
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 13
Words: 23,468
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3236432
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Lazarusmycroft/pseuds/LTiger
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Jim and Sebastian have a troubled past and it haunts Sebastian as he tries to make amends for his mistakes.  Jim gives him a second chance while playing his own twisted games.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> "Fixation or psychosis?  
> Devoted to neurosis now"

Sebastian was exhausted, exhausted in a way which he had never experienced before. He was positive that if he didn't get inside his flat and as far as the sofa in the next sixty seconds he would pass out on the pavement and pedestrians would be forced to step over his used up body.

He’d been on a job for the last forty eight hours and had had no sleep and no substance with the exception of coffee. But he didn't even care about food right now all he wanted was simply to sleep, to close his eyes for at least two days and make up for lost time. Unfortunately in his life and with his boss things never seemed to pan out the way he hoped.

Turning the key in the lock he paused, suddenly he was wide awake and he reached inside his fitted leather jacket for the pistol that he had concealed there and pulled it out. With the toe of his boot he nudged the unlocked door open and silently stepped inside the darkened flat. Looking around with heightened senses that would’ve picked up the sound of a pin dropping he quickly found the intruder.

Lounging on his sofa as though he owned the damn place was none other than the man whom he had only just been thinking about. His boss. James Moriarty. Most dangerous man in London he was called, right now Sebastian thought he was more like the most infuriatingly intrusive man in London.

“Jesus Christ Jim, I nearly blew your fucking head off.” he said by way of greeting as he tucked his gun back inside his coat and sat down in the over stuffed arm chair to undo his boots. “Ye really shouldn’t show up unannounced like this, especially after I’ve been working for the last couple days.”

Jim didn’t respond or indeed even change the expression on his face. He sat with his legs crossed over one another and his fingers steepled and pressed lightly against his mouth, his mouth which was currently smirking in what Sebastian thought was an unnecessarily irritating fashion. Once both of his muddy and clunky boots were off and he had a chance to stretch his aching toes he looked back to JIm and changed his tone-slightly, feeling a tiny bit better.

“What’s going on boss? Why are you here?” He heard the edge to his voice but now that he was sitting his weariness was getting the better of him. He needed to rest.

“I need your help Sebastian.”

It was most certainly not a request but Sebastian couldn’t resist allowing himself to believe it was. Jim Moriarty never requested help even when it seemed that was exactly what he _was_ doing, no, he demanded your services and there was never really any other option. At least nothing desirable. Sebastian closed his burning eyes for a second before opening them and locking them with the cold, shrewd and enigmatic eyes staring him down.

“Yeah? What is it this time? It’s just-I only just got back from the last job and I’m a tad bushed. Can it wait?”

Jim shook his dark head, the smirk still firmly in place.

“Fine, of course ye know I’ll do whatever ya need.”

“Good,” Jim leaned forward and placed his elbows on his knees, Sebastian found he couldn’t look away even if he wanted to. “I need to meet with a business associate in Paris. It’s neutral ground for us both.” he said in response to the look on Sebastian’s face, “I need you to accompany me, it’s very important that you do.”

“Okay, I don’t see what exactly you need me for if it’s only a business meeting though.”

Jim chuckled dryly at that. “This associate is dangerous and will not show up alone, of that I’m quite sure. We leave at seven. That gives you a few hours of sleep. My car will be here for you in the morning.”

Jim stood and so did Sebastian then as they headed for the door. Just before he was able to step out onto the landing Sebastian impulsively reached out and grabbed his boss by his arm. Jim’s eyes flashed dangerously but Sebastian ignored him.

“Jim...I-” he released his grip on the other’s arm and looked down at his bare feet while putting his hand on the back of his neck as he struggled for the right words. “I know- I know I’ve fucked up, I’m sorry. I am, but … I dunno...I’m just sorry I guess.” he finished lamely and when he brought his gaze back to Jim’s face he was shocked by the wide grin. He’d come to understand that he’d never have this man figured out.

“Sebastian, the past is the past. Don’t waste another moment thinking on things we can’t change, it doesn’t do to dwell on the past. Look sharp tomorrow my dear, ciao.” Then he turned and was gone.

Sebastian watched him until he was out of sight and then went back inside his flat locking the numerous locks behind him and clumsily making his way to his bed. He couldn’t even remember falling asleep but he did set his alarm, even in his sleep deprived stupor he wasn’t careless and he wouldn’t dare be late for Jim.

When his alarm went off hours later it was still dark outside and he almost convinced himself that it had been in his dream. A minute or two later everything came flooding back to him and he flung his legs over the bed and stepped onto the frigid wooden floor with his bare feet. As he showered he couldn’t help feeling excited at the prospect of working side by side with Jim again. He wanted to make amends for the last time-well- he was going to try to not think about that. It wouldn't help anyone anyway as Jim said, _"It doesn't do to dwell on the past."_  so, he wouldn’t.

At six thirty he was showered, shaved and dressed in dark denim jeans and a black fitted t-shirt over which he wore his favorite leather jacket (it was his favorite because of the convenient inside pocket which held his pistol nicely). He checked and double checked that he had his passport and his backup passport (in case things went awry) a change of clothes and extra rounds tucked safely away in his carry on tote. He felt as prepared as it was possible to be in this situation and he grabbed his dark sunglasses and keys and wallet and awaited the text from Jim telling him to come out to the car. It arrived promptly at seven and he closed and locked the door of his flat, of course he had no way of knowing that he’d never return there.


	2. Chapter 2

He was surprised and annoyed when he slid into the back of the luxury car and Jim wasn’t there. He supposed it was stupid to expect them to travel together to the tiny private airport but he had been looking forward to seeing him again, it had been far too long and yesterday was the spark to ignite Sebastian once again.He thought that he’d go on the rest of his life doing Jim’s work but never actually seeing his face again. It was the agreement that they had struck after-- he shook himself and looked out the window at the city as it came awake.

Compulsively he checked his mobile for any other texts from Jim. He couldn’t resist the temptation to scroll up and read the old messages. Before today the last message that Jim had sent him was a year and half ago and he hadn’t looked at it since that day.

_~I’ll be in touch~ JM_

That was all and then he had _not_ been in touch, at least not personally and Sebastian felt like he had been punched in the stomach and for the first few weeks he had been hardly able to breathe. One day, many weeks later when the harsh winter had finally begun to relent and the new, fresh scent of spring was in the air, his long silent mobile finally vibrated from deep within his pocket. He had thought and hoped it would be from Jim but the number on the display was one he didn’t recognize and he sighed deeply but he was happy for the work. He needed to do something, moping around his flat and drinking himself into a coma nightly wasn’t working anymore. So, he welcomed the distraction.

From that day onward he would receive random messages telling him the vital information that he would need in order to work a job efficiently. It went on that way for ages, until yesterday. He could tell that they weren’t far off from the airport now and he felt a burning nervous sensation in his lower abdomen and he couldn’t help sitting up straighter. As the car rolled smoothly to a stop near the waiting single prop plane he could taste the longing on the back of his tongue like a smooth whisky and he relished it. Sliding his dark glasses on to conceal his tired eyes he stepped out onto the noisy and cold pavement.

He glanced all around once and ascended the stairs to the cabin. Not really knowing what he was expecting he still managed to feel a bit surprised when he saw Jim sitting alone with his back to him. His shining dark hair and hunched shoulders made Sebastian want to reach out and touch him, hold him, just once. He told himself that he just needed one last embrace to find his own closure and then he’d move on and be able to handle it all in a very professional manner. He was lying to himself as usual.

He took a deep breath and shoved his bag in an overhead compartment then went and sat in the seat across from Jim. He was reading a newspaper, Sebastian couldn’t help recalling how he loved new papers. He would read as many as he could get his hands on each day and Sebastian used to laugh at him. He always wondered why Jim would want to read more papers than he thought normal but in the time after he was on his own he found himself reading any news paper he could get his hands on. In Sebastian’s case however it was mostly to make sure that Jim’s name never appeared there.

“Still at it then?” he asked and then realized how lame his words sounded and Jim never even raised his eyes to Sebastian’s.

Sighing he sat back in his chair and buckled his seat-belt while he looked out the window to the tarmac and the small figures rushing about and preparing the plane for take off. These were all employees of Jim’s, Sebastian knew most of them by sight and he knew that they were trustworthy.

Unconsciously he began biting his thumb nail, take off always made him uneasy.

“That is a most detestable habit.”

“Hmm?” Sebastian hadn’t even been aware of what he was doing so Jim’s comment confused him at first until he bit the nail too far down that it began to hurt almost instantly.

He took his hand away from his mouth then and looked across at Jim who was now eyeing him with interest, his newspaper set aside and forgotten.

“I forgot that you weren’t a fan of flying. It’ll be over before you know it my dear.”

Sebastian cracked a smile for the first time. “It’s not flying that bothers me it’s crashing.”

Now it was Jim’s turn to smile. “Ah- very clever.” he was silent for a moment then, never taking his dark eyes from Sebastian’s face he said, “You look different. You’ve changed.”

It was said as a matter of fact, not something open for discussion, he was simply observing the man whom he once knew better than anyone. Sebastian convinced himself that there was just a slight edge of bitterness to his voice.

“We’ve both changed I’ll wager.” Sebastian responded wishing he had a glass of Scotch available to him. “I’d say its hard to come out on the other side of what we did and not be a different person. Different men.”

“Mmmm. Yes, I quite agree.” He sat silently observing Sebastian then and, not for the first time, Sebastian found himself wishing he could change the past, wishing he was a better man but he knew it was all quite fanciful and if he was being honest he knew that he would’ve done it all in the exact same manner as before.

“Are ye ever going to tell me what’s going on now or am I gonna have to fumble around in the dark?”

“You know all that you need to know my dear, at least, for the time being…” he trailed off and looked out the window as the engines roared to life and the plane began to taxi slowly at first and then to pick up momentum. The noise of the engines ended all conversation for the moment and Sebastian just watched Jim a moment longer and then he closed his eyes; it was always better if he tried to sleep during a flight. He’d have time, he’d _make_ time for he and Jim to sort things later. His body must’ve been still been quite exhausted since he fell asleep in almost no time at all.


	3. Chapter 3

_This was familiar. This place and this setting. The cold, bare concrete floors and the hard, unforgiving metal chair. It was so cold and damp that he felt it settle deep in his aching bones. The blackness was complete and enveloping. He could almost taste the metallic tang of blood in the back of his throat and he imagined the phantom pains of his throbbing shoulders as they were bound painfully behind him. He’d learned a long time ago, he couldn’t remember now if it had been a week or a month and he had no way of knowing, to fear the footsteps in the echoing darkness._

_He kept wishing that one time the torturer would simply kill him. He prayed silently and fervently that they would accidentally go one too far and he wouldn’t have to endure any more. He never showed an ounce of weakness however, but he never stopped praying for it to end. Death in this cold, forgotten place would be preferable to another second of this abuse. But the relief never came and on and on it went._

_It reached a point when he’d even forgotten why he’d been brought here. He couldn’t even answer their inquiries if he wanted to, which he didn’t.  Days ran steadily into one another in a timeless, pain-filled smear. The beatings were regular and became more and more frequent. At one point he actually found himself wishing that he had the information they sought just to put an end to the brutality. He knew he deserved what was happening, he wasn’t a good man or a good person and he’d tortured men before as well so he never felt sorry for himself just tired._

_His jailer approached again in the darkness and he felt his body tense as the steps approached. A sharp, open-handed slap across the right side of his already bruised and bloodied face got his attention. Silence. Another slap on the opposite side and he had no control over the movement of his neck. He’d become so weakened from minimal food and just drops of water to sustain him_.

“ _Sebastian. Sebastian_! SEBASTIAN!”

He knew that voice, he’d know that melodic, beautiful lilt anywhere in the universe. His tired, grey eyes snapped open then and he was looking confusedly at the speaker. Jim. It was very noisy and he realized sluggishly that he’d fallen asleep and he was still on the plane heading for France. It had only been a dream or, more accurately, a nightmare. Blinking and stretching he sat up straighter.

“‘M sorry. Didn’t realize I was still so tired.”

Jim was watching him with an odd expression. What was it? Pity? Anger? Remorse? It was nearly impossible to tell. Unexpectedly he slid from his seat to his knees and moved so he was kneeling directly in front of Sebastian. Sebastian was positive that his nightmare had transitioned into a lovely dream, his subconscious trying to apologize for making him relive that horror. Then he felt Jim’s cold hands on his knees through the denim and then as he gently slid them up to rest on his thighs. Sebastian just watched, it was all he was capable of doing it seemed.

“Tell me,” he said in that mesmerizing drawl which never failed to draw Sebastian in as he slid his nimble hands to the hem of Sebastian's t-shirt, “how many new scars now adorn this most beautiful work of art?” He had lifted Sebastian’s shirt to reveal his abs and the many crisscrossing and raised marks.

Some were slightly pinker and obviously newer, all together they had the effect of making it look like Sebastian had been sewn together hastily. Jim’s cold fingers lovingly caressed the marks and his eyes went darker reminding Sebastian of a late summer sky as a thunderstorm rolls in unexpectedly and turns the world tumultuous for a brief time. Sebastian never took his gaze from Jim’s face.

Finally, swallowing hard, he put his hands on each of Jim’s wrists and gently moved them away from his burning flesh. He wasn’t embarrassed by his body’s reaction to Jim’s touch, hardly that, but this wasn’t what was needed. They needed to sort everything out, the proper way.

Jim watched him in confusion. “Is something wrong? Isn’t this what you wanted? I know for a fact that you’ve spent the last year and a half pining away..”

Sebastian flattened his t-shirt down and leaned forward cupping Jim’s face in his large hands. “Aye, you’re absolutely right about that and I’d pine away for another year and a half if that was what was needed.”

They stayed that way for a long time and then Jim made to move away but Sebastian held him firmly in place.

“We’re nearly there Sebastian. This is absurd.”

Without really thinking Sebastian leaned a few inches forward and put his mouth on Jim’s. He just kissed his mouth at first, a few small pecks as he hoped to convey his meaning and then he decided to go for broke. It wasn’t like there was anywhere for Jim to go at the moment so he seized it. Pressing his mouth harder against Jim’s and then licking his lips he finally made him relent and open up.

Suddenly he was being grabbed forcibly by his t-shirt and pulled forward. He devoured every second of it like a starving man at a banquet. He’d missed him so fucking much and he almost couldn’t believe that this was real but he didn’t even care. He held their faces together by firmly holding Jim at the back of his head. Five minutes or two hours later they broke apart but didn’t separate, they leaned their foreheads against one another and both smiled breathlessly.

Sebastian leaned in again for a small peck and with an enormous effort sat back in his seat as the pilot was announcing their approach to the airport. Jim stood and brushed his dark suit clean of any lint and adjusted his tie. He stood for a moment and surveyed Sebastian who never looked away or removed the cocky smirk from his chiseled face.

“We have much to discuss my love and some things that require atonement. We’ll chat later.”

“Whatever ye say boss. I’m at your _service_.”


	4. Chapter 4

The two men disembarked and both, simultaneously, slid their sunglasses on to shield their eyes from the blinding bright sun. It took Sebastian a moment as he looked around the tiny little air strip to realize that they were not in fact in Paris. He didn’t know where they were but Jim seemed unconcerned as he headed for the idling black sedan. Sebastian picked up his pace and followed.

Sliding into the back and tossing his leather bag on the floor he was just in time to hear Jim speaking in French to the driver, evidently giving him directions. The man smiled, he was probably somewhere in his fifties with silver hair that still seemed to be flecked with traces of dark. Sebastian thought that Jim seemed familiar with him in a way which he wasn’t with other employees. When he looked over at Jim as the car rolled smoothly away he was surprised to see a small grin playing at the corners of his mouth.

Sebastian just sighed and went about watching his surroundings slip by as he tried to grasp where they were and where they were heading because he knew better than to ask Jim for any details. Finally after nearly a quarter of an hour and when Sebastian resigned himself to simply being a passenger he felt Jim’s cold hand on the back of his where it rested on the black leather seat. He glanced down and then back up to see Jim watching him.

“We’re nearly there now.” he commented and then turned his head to look out of his own window.

Sebastian wanted to ask, “nearly where?” but he bit his tongue and waited. He’d learned to be a very patient man when it came to Jim Moriarty. Everything was done at his speed and his alone and Sebastian knew it.

The car rolled to a stop in a gravel drive in front of a lichen covered stone country house. Tall grass and shrubbery were everywhere but there wasn’t another car in sight and Sebastian was even more confused. Jim spoke quietly with the driver again and then watched as he drove away, his tires gently kicking up the loose gravel. He watched until the car was out of sight and then turned to Sebastian with a wicked little smile and turned for the seemingly vacant house. Sebastian did the only reasonable thing and followed him. As he stepped on to the small stone porch he saw a brass placard on the house that said ‘Moriarty’. Sebastian just shook his head and pushed the heavy oak door open.

He was standing in a cavernous foyer and he wondered just how long ago this place had been built. Just to the right was a dark wooden staircase that had a threadbare runner going up that looked as though it was quite expensive and most likely custom made. The entire place screamed of wealth and prestige and something else that he couldn’t quite put his finger on.

When he entered the open and well lit kitchen he saw Jim reaching into a tall cupboard trying to bring down two wine glasses. Seb walked up behind him and easily grabbed them between his long fingers but by doing so he’d pinned Jim against the scrubbed wooden counter. At first Jim didn’t say anything or even move he just stood with his back to Sebastian who wasn’t moving either. Finally Jim wiggled and turned so that he had his back to the counter and Sebastian, who was keeping him in place with both large hands splayed on the counter behind him, had to stifle his laughter at the look of annoyance on the criminal’s face. They stood that way for a moment until Sebastian was caught off guard by Jim grabbing the front of his jeans and squeezing just a little. He smirked and leaned down to kiss Jim on his mouth once before moving away to go and lean against the large wooden island in the center of the room.

Jim wordlessly grabbed the glasses which Sebastian had retrieved and reached under the island to the full wine rack and pulled out a bottle. French and nearly fifty years old. “My granddad bottled this.” he said quietly without looking at Sebastian. Sebastian just nodded and stood with his arms folded across his chest.

Jim moved about the room uncorking the bottle and pouring some of the fragrant Bordeaux into each glass and then handing one to Sebastian. “What’s all this about then?” Sebastian asked as he sniffed the wine and tried to discern the individual aromas.

Jim seemed to contemplate the question and then he held up his glass. Sebastian mirrored him.

“To moving on.”

“Here, here.”

Then they both drank and it wasn’t long until Jim was refilling their glasses. By the third glass Jim had undone his tie and thrown it carelessly aside which was a striking indication of how tipsy he was feeling. He was never careless with his things, especially his ties and tie pins. He treasured them.

The two men had moved to the sitting room where Sebastian had fixed a fire in the grate and they sat on the large, distressed leather sofa enjoying the other’s company and feeling at ease for probably the first time that either of them could remember in a long time. The sun slowly slid from the sky turning the world first different shades of indigo and violets and then finally leaving them in blackness flecked only with the occasional cold white moon light.

Sebastian enjoyed the night, it was easier to forget who and what a person was when the daylight was gone from the world. He found it peaceful and reverent. Jim was the one to break the comfortable silence.

“I nearly killed you.”

“Hmmm. No less than I deserved, I’d say.”

He didn’t miss the tiny smirk in the low lighting from the fire. “I still don’t know why I didn’t do it.”

Now Sebastian grinned, “My dashing good looks perhaps?”

“Its not a joke Sebastian.” his words were a sharp rebuke, “You made a fatal error, you overstepped your bounds and some people, _important_ people, paid dearly.”

Sebastian set his glass down on the side table and turned his body so he was facing Jim fully. Jim continued to stare at him as though he might still be contemplating Sebastian’s fate.

“Listen, Jim, I _know_ I fucked up. But don’t ya dare sit there and tell me that you don’t think I did everything I could, I fucken tried-” he stopped, he wondered now as on so many other occasions since if he should just tell him. “Jim, there’s something you need to know..” he had to stop again, he couldn’t do it and his voice was about to crack and betray the emotion he was feeling and a moment of weakness was the last thing he needed right now.

Jim’s voice was low, almost a whisper. “I know.” he said then he stood up abruptly and left the room.

Sebastian quickly rubbed a hand over his face to get rid of the evidence of his tears. Jim came back quickly bearing two full glasses of whisky. He handed one to Sebastian and then offered him his empty right hand and pulled him to his feet.

“I _understand_ why you did what you did, Sebastian but it doesn’t mean I’ll ever forgive you. Remember that, understanding does not equal forgiveness.” he paused and Sebastian felt cold inside as he wondered where this was going. “But, nothing can be done now and we’re here, for the moment.” he then downed his entire drink and set the empty glass on the mantle, Sebastian followed his lead.

Without much thought he did the one thing that felt right after so many long months of only doing what was wrong, he stepped forward and wrapped his arms around Jim’s waist to pull him in close to kiss him. Jim responded immediately and it was like the last eighteen months had never happened, it all evaporated within a second of their embrace. Jim’s hands immediately went to the hem of Sebastian’s t-shirt and he quickly pulled it up and over his head. Sebastian tried hard not to think of the monster he’d resemble in the flickering firelight covered in raised scars.

He brought his hands to the buttons on Jim’s shirt and undid them with remarkably steady fingers considering how long he’d been waiting for this. Jim just leaned in and kissed his neck, nibbling and sucking and it was easy for Sebastian to believe that Jim needed and wanted him just as much as he needed and wanted Jim.

In just a few brief moments they were both naked from the waist up and pressed up against each other. Jim’s touch was light and cold but also hungry and needing, he traced his hands over the long scars on the length of Sebastian’s back and Sebastian found he didn’t mind nearly as much as he’d thought he would. Jim then brought his hands back and firmly pushed Sebastian into a prone position on the sofa where he promptly climbed on top and moved his hands to the buckle of Sebastian’s belt and undid his jeans.

Together the slid the jeans and his pants down over his hips and then Jim was leaning forward licking and kissing along Sebastian’s ribs and then lower to his abs as he moved his hands to the hard length of Sebastian’s cock. “Ji-Jim...wait…” he paused and looked up curiously. “just- are ya- are ya quite sure this is what you wanna do?” he hated himself for even asking it but he had to. Jim just smiled wickedly and dipped his head.

“Ffffuu…” was all that Sebastian was capable of spluttering as he felt the warm slick sensation of his mouth on his cock. Closing his eyes and leaning his head back he gently pushed his hips forward and revelled in the sensation of being all the way in, to the back of Jim’s throat. The slight gagging noise from the man sucking him off was better than any dirty talk he decided.

Jim moved his tongue in ways that Sebastian hadn’t thought would be possible and he sucked at the head while it was all Sebastian could do not to shout out. The final straw was when Jim brought one hand up to squeeze and gently cup his balls. He arched his back and held on to the back of Jim’s head a bit tighter.

A few moments later Jim came up and laid his head on Sebastian’s chest as the fire began to die away. Sebastian curled his arms around the man protectively and he was briefly unsure of who he was protecting, himself or Jim? He’d figure it out sooner probably rather than later. In less than five minutes he was met with the soft sounds of Jim’s deep breathing and he knew he’d fallen asleep. Sebastian wondered idly why he didn’t feel happier or more content, why did he feel afraid?


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> "Good God, let me give you my life"

Sebastian inhaled deeply on the cigarette and savored the taste of the tobacco and the momentary numbness that spread to his extremities. He wondered how long it had been since his last smoke, a year? Maybe. For some reason now he didn’t really care. He’d only quit before to challenge himself, give his mind something to focus on. The semi-transparent white smoke evaporated into the black night sky and he gazed upward. He tried hard not to think about the man lying asleep on the sofa inside and all that they’d been through.

His life had never been easy, no one had ever handed him anything and when he met Jim so many years ago it was like a dream. Finally, he thought, he was going somewhere in life and he never thought twice about any job he was given, ever. He had also never intended to fall for Jim and he was pretty sure that Jim had never thought for a second that he’d fall for Sebastian so he felt they were equals in that respect.

He had no idea how long he stood there, in the back garden, smoking and watching the moon move slowly across the starlit sky but he was startled when he felt a hand at the small of his back.

“It’s miraculous, don’t you think?”

He crushed out his finished cigarette and reached for Jim’s hand to bring him close. “Yes,” he said not looking at the sky but at the man in his arms. “its truly a gift.”

Jim huffed out a laugh and turned his head ever so slightly to look into Sebastian’s face. Whatever it was that he saw there obviously caused him to soften his demeanor even if it was only momentary. Reaching one hand up and placing it on Sebastian’s scruffy jaw he said, “You used to be happy.” and before Sebastian could scoff he continued, “I know we are both different and not in a good way but you’re much more... _jaded_ and far more cynical than I recall.”

Sebastian didn’t know how to respond and frankly he didn’t think there was anything he could say so he stayed silent. Unbidden images of her face swam across his vision and he had to physically shake his head to clear his mind. Jim noticed but thankfully he didn’t say anything and moved a tad closer to Sebastian. The two men were silent then for a while as the wind picked up and then finally, sometime close to dawn, Sebastian nudged Jim in the direction of the house and bed. He laid awake for a long time after that and he knew Jim did too because it was too quiet. There was no deep and steady breathing just the complete silence of two men that are haunted by things they can’t change and a future that neither could truly predict.

* * *

 

_He must’ve fallen asleep because he was pretty sure that this could only be happening in his mind. They were at their favorite little restaurant, it was quaint and little known but the owners made a point of learning their guest’s names and making them feel welcome. Their waiter, Dominic, brought the bottle of wine to their table and poured them each a glass then he left them alone for a time, Sebastian had given him a generous tip earlier to do so._

_He reached across the table and took her hand in his and she smiled sweetly over her glass. She was wearing her dark hair pulled back in low bun at her neck and the diamond necklace shone and sparkled magnificently where it rested on her elegant neck. He thought the scarlet dress was the perfect color on her and brought out the warm tones in her dark eyes._

_“Janine,” he began and she just watched with a small smile, “I find it hard to believe that we’ve been seeing each other for several months. It has been...nothing short of amazing.”_

_She laughed again and nodded as she reached for her glass but didn’t release his left hand. She gently rubbed her finger over the gold ring he wore on his little finger. The flickering candlelight danced in her eyes and he felt inexplicably compelled toward her, he couldn’t resist the urge to reach out and touch her picture perfect face. Just as he reached across however it swam out of focus and he blinked._

* * *

 

He was lying in a very large and soft bed...alone. He covered his eyes with the back of his arm for a minute as he tried to remember the dream and what had brought him here. He only had a moment to lay that way and he heard the soft sounds of footsteps on the cold wood floor followed by the soft protest of the springs as someone sat down on the bed. He moved his arm away and saw Jim sitting naked in the early afternoon light, his hair was damp and he was smiling impishly.

“Good afternoon. How did you sleep?”

Sebastian smiled and grabbed him by his upper arm to pull him across the bed and on top of him. Grabbing his arse firmly he held him in place and covered his mouth with his own. He sweetly and gently slid his tongue over Jim’s and grazed his teeth softly. He loved the way he smelled, the shampoo scent still fresh in his hair, his breath still minty from the toothpaste and his skin still warm and pliant from the hot shower. Sebastian felt himself becoming aroused and was pleased that it wasn’t unmatched.

The soft golden sunlight fell across their bodies and made the goose pimples on Jim’s skin even more evident. The lightweight quilt fell away and they rolled to their side while never releasing the other’s body from their arms. Sebastian tilted his head back and felt Jim take the opportunity to kiss and bite at his exposed neck and he smiled blissfully with his eyes closed. The warm pressure of Jim’s body on and next to his was reassuring in so many ways and he wasn’t convinced that he hadn’t died and gone to some kind of heaven. Then he felt Jim’s hands on his thighs as he moved his legs to a more comfortable position; wrapped tightly around his body.

They stayed that way for sometime, just lazily kissing and nibbling at each other. Sebastian thought it felt like the first time they were together; in this moment they had no past, no present and no future. It was just them, simply the two of them and they were perfect. They fit together like pieces of a puzzle and that would always be something that amazed Sebastian. He put one hand firmly behind Jim’s head and gently flipped him so he was beneath Sebastian’s body, his erection rubbing against his leg.

Sebastian braced himself on his forearms where they rested on either side of Jim’s head and he leaned down until his lips were almost touching Jim’s. “You’re like an itch I can’t seem to reach, d’you know that?”

“Mmmm, I _do_ know that. Luckily for you I have very sharp claws.”

Sebastian laughed and closed the distance between their mouths. It had only been seconds since their last contact but to him it felt like centuries and he made sure to get that message across to Jim. He used his tongue to trace the perfect outline of Jim’s lips and he loved the slight stubble that scraped across his sensitive tongue. Finally he took his right hand and slid it low to Jim’s cock where he wrapped his fingers around the throbbing width and moved his hand slowly up and down which elicited the exact reaction he’d been hoping for, a low and throaty moan. Once Jim was putty in his able hands he moved lower and gently inserted a finger and then a second and he couldn’t help grinning evilly at the soft, needing gasps coming from Jim.

He fingered and toyed with him for a few minutes until Jim was grinding his hips against Sebastian and he knew that it wouldn’t be long for him either. He rolled over and reached to the bedside table for the small bottle in the drawer. Jim took the moment to bite and nip at his neck and collarbone causing Sebastian to gasp loudly, the only person on earth that knew exactly what he liked and he used that knowledge like a weapon when they were in bed. Sebastian forcibly grabbed Jim by his hips and flipped him so he was face down on the bed with his arse in the air. He squeezed a small amount of the clear gel into his hand and rubbed it on himself and slid a finger inside Jim before guiding his cock slowly inside.

He watched as Jim’s hands curled tightly in the blankets and he stifled a moan with a pillow. Sebastian place both of his hands on the other’s hips and began to move in slow rhythmic movements, he didn’t want it to end too quickly and Jim had his own plans as he was trying to move at his own speed.

“Jesus fuck, Jim.” Sebastian muttered and then he gave up all control and began to move with much more urgency.

His breath was coming in short and shallow gasps now and he could feel his cock throbbing and aching as he reached his climax. Jim shuddered and gasped beneath him as he came and then went weak. Sebastian traced his fingers once down his spine and then pulled out to flop down on the bed covered in a sheen of sweat and feeling blissfully satisfied. Jim rolled over and put his head on Sebastian’s shoulder where he kissed him sweetly once and then he moved his hand down to Sebastian’s still erect cock and fell asleep in moments.

Several hours later Sebastian woke and found he was starving, he couldn’t recall when he’d eaten last. He sat up and saw that it was dark outside and just as he swung his legs over the bed Jim came in wearing a towel around his waist and running another one through his damp hair. He stopped when he saw Sebastian was awake and smiled at him. “Get up tiger, we’re going to Paris.”

“Yeah? About that… I thought we were supposed to already be in Paris.”

Jim walked away to the huge closet and came out holding a garment bag and looking annoyed.

“Your things are in the bathroom, time is of the essence dear.”

Sebastian sighed and stood up, stretching and not missing the way Jim’s eyes roved over his naked body as he did. “ _Good_ ,” he thought and he padded from the room and toward the bathroom.


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> "Too many war wounds and not enough wars  
> Too few rounds in the ring and not enough settled scores  
> Too many sharks, not enough blood in the waves  
> You know I give my love a f-f-four letter name"

Sebastian walked out of the bathroom dressed in his tailored (by whom and how he had no idea) black suit and crisp white shirt. Jim was just finishing tying his shoes and he looked up from the low bench with a grin.

“My, _my_. You _do_ clean up well, I seem to have forgotten.” He stood and came over to where he had stopped and took the blood-red tie from his hand. “I’ll have to force you into one of these more often.”

Sebastian snorted as Jim reached around him and placed the tie around his neck pulling it taut. For some reason he _actually_ thought that Jim was going to simply tie the tie and walk away but he should’ve known better by now. Jim took the loose ends and forcibly pulled Sebastian forward and once he had him in his grip he slid his hands inside his unbuttoned coat and held on tightly as he nipped at Sebastian’s bottom lip. Sebastian grabbed both sides of Jim’s face and held on firmly as he took exactly what he wanted. Moving his hips in closer he made sure to press up against Jim.  He realized that he honestly couldn’t care less if they ever left this place, if they never had to get dressed or leave the soft, downy bed again he’d be okay with that. Sadly, that wasn’t an option.

Jim bit and licked his lower lip a few times more and then pulled away and grabbed the loose ends of the tie again. “C’mon love. We do have an appointment.”

Sebastian sighed in mock exasperation but didn’t back away as he watched every single movement of Jim’s hands as they deftly and expertly tied his tie into a perfect windsor. Just as he was about turn and walk away he grabbed the lapels of Sebastian’s coat firmly.

“I promise that you will be paid quite well...later.” then he turned and headed for the door but he stopped and pulled a small package wrapped in gold paper from his inside pocket and tossed it to Sebastian who caught it in one hand. “For you.”  was all he said.

Sebastian neatly removed the paper and opened the small box to find his missing gold ring shining in the dim light. The small Celtic cross was glinting dully on the front and the initials **_J.M._** were on the inside and he was floored. He’d not planned to ever see that ring again and even though he knew well the resources that Jim had at his disposal it was still amazing that he’d been able to recover this. He felt his throat tighten and he took it and slid it on his pinky while silently vowing to never lose it again and the only way it would ever come off would be when it was pried from his cold, lifeless finger.

He left the room then and went downstairs to find Jim waiting for him in the foyer and he saw the flash of headlights in the drive. They went out together into the chilly night air and Sebastian couldn’t stop his eyes from roving the entire area, he felt that he could never be too careful. Once Jim slid into the back of the sedan and he’d closed the door behind him he briskly walked around to the other side and got in.

It was the same man driving them Sebastian noticed and he made a mental note to check him out later, he had a friend in intelligence that owed him a favor. Something was beginning to bug him about the man and the easy rapport that he seemed to have with Jim. Had he not known Jim as well as he did he wouldn’t think twice about it but he _did_ know him well and he knew that he was the only person alive that he trusted and sometimes Sebastian even wondered about that.

They arrived in almost no time at the tiny private airstrip but this time there was no single prop waiting for them instead a glistening black helicopter was whipping up the wind and dirt and looked just about prepared for lift off. Sebastian rolled his eyes in the darkness, how very like Jim to arrive at his meeting in the most ostentatious style.

The ride was quick and beautiful, the lights of towns below twinkling pleasantly up at them as they passed and Sebastian realized he was enjoying this. He’d never been on a helicopter for pleasure before so it was actually a nice experience. He could feel Jim watching him and he smiled sweetly over at him. The pilot set them down on a helipad on the top of some very tall building and they got off, each was forced to hold their hair back to keep it from whipping into their eyes from the blades of the chopper. Once the pilot lifted off again and the wind died away Sebastian smoothed the hair back and straightened his suit.

No one was around and he thought now might be a good time to try to glean any information about the evening ahead of them. The stars twinkled coldly down at them and just as they reached the heavy steel door with a keypad Sebastian reached out and grabbed Jim by his arm.

“Jim, ya need to clue me in a smidge. I’m not goin’ in to this blind.”

Jim’s eyes flashed and for one second Sebastian actually thought that Jim might hit him but then his features softened and he glanced up at the sky once. Licking his lips he pulled Sebastian into the shadow of the concrete structure that they were about to enter.

“I can’t tell you too much Sebastian, you’ll understand eventually. I need you to trust me on this. Can you do that?” Jim’s eyes were intense and pleading, it was a new experience for Sebastian.

Finally, sighing, he said, “yeah, I can do that.” Jim smiled and made to turn away but Sebastian grabbed his arm again, “but...I need to know...how- how did you manage to get this back?” he held up his hand and displayed the ring on his pinky.

Jim laughed and his eyebrows shot up dangerously close to his hairline but Sebastian waited. “Oh, fine, it wasn’t hard to track down. Whomever had found it after you were _careless_ with it pawned it and, I daresay, didn’t get the full amount that they should have. Regardless, the engraving on the inside is fairly significant and the craftsmanship is truly one of a kind and so it happened that an associate who deals in these things ran across it and of course never hesitated to phone me. I thought you might like to have it back.”

Sebastian had looked down at his hand and twisted the gold around his finger a few times, he couldn’t believe how much he had missed it, it was remarkable. He thought of this ring as Jim’s silent vow that no matter what kind of bastard he was that at the end of the day he’d be _Sebastian’s_ bastard. He thought of his numerous scars in the same way, it was his silent promise to Jim that he’d only come home to him and he felt now that he wanted Jim to know that. He stepped forward and placed both hands at Jim’s hips and pulled him in close. Leaning down he kissed him softly on his mouth and then slowly to the right and along his jawline as he moved to his ear. His breath was hot and his voice was low but Jim didn’t miss a syllable. “It is the most perfect gift I’ve ever received.”

“Very good, I’m glad y-”

“I’m not talking about the ring.” then he gently but with determination pushed him back against the wall and kissed him. Jim’s mouth was warm and tasted sweet and he vaguely wondered how he had survived all those months without him and then he realized that that was just it, that was all he’d done, survived. Jim pulled away and kissed him once on his jaw as he turned for the door.

“We shall have plenty of time later for thank-you’s and making nice. Come along, we don’t want to keep our guest waiting.” He punched a few buttons on the keypad and Sebastian heard the locks release and then Jim swung the door easily open while smiling devilishly over his shoulder.

They were in a cold and industrial feeling corridor with steps that went down an uncountable amount of floors. They walked down several flights in silence, their shiny dress shoes tapping out an annoying beat. When they reached a corridor that had a red number twenty five on the wall Jim stopped on the landing and looked pointedly at Sebastian. Sebastian suddenly felt uneasy and it seemed that his revolver that was concealed in his coat was much heavier than he remembered. He waited, expecting Jim to say something, explain where they were, give an inkling of what was happening but instead he just stared into Sebastian’s eyes for an interminable amount of time and then he turned and pushed the door open.

They were let out into a hallway, a hotel hallway. Doors lined the walls all the way down, spaced evenly with brass numbers and peep holes on each along with a key card reader. The place seemed very posh, the carpet, while still slightly tacky in the way of hotels, wasn’t as bad as some he’d seen and the walls were not painted any kind of garish color. Sebastian sincerely wished that he knew where they were but before he could consider it any further Jim had taken off at a brisk pace.

He had begun to put things together on his own however and as he caught up to Jim he asked, “This is your place then? You own this hotel?”

Jim smirked, “Clever boy. Knew you’d work it out. We are dining in the restaurant here. Our associates will have already arrived and with any luck they will be starting their second glass of champagne.”

They had reached the lift now and Jim smoothed his hair back once then reached out to adjust Sebastian’s tie. “It’s going to be a...bang up...of an evening I think.”

Sebastian did not like the sound of that he decided as the lift arrived. When they stepped into the glistening lobby the restaurant was just to the left and the delectable aroma of the presumably exquisite cuisine met Sebastian’s nostrils making his stomach growl. They walked in and everyone seemed to know Jim which wasn’t surprising but always made Sebastian a bit nervous. The maitre’d fawned all over them and led them promptly to their table where, he informed them in heavily accented English, that their guests were waiting and had been well cared for.

They turned the corner and Sebastian stopped in his tracks, his body had gone numb.

“Ah! Ms. Morstan!” Jim exclaimed and the petite blonde woman stood to kiss him on both cheeks. Her cold eyes glanced once over Sebastian and she ignored him as completely as a bit of gum on a sidewalk.

“I hope I didn’t keep you waiting too long dear?” Jim asked in his silky smooth voice and she smiled wolfishly at him. “No! Of course not, I’ve only just arrived and had a chance to sample this divine champagne.” 

Sebastian’s ears were buzzing and he felt dizzy. What the _fuck_ was Jim playing at? How the hell was he supposed to make it through this evening? He felt sick and clammy but he knew what he had to do so he walked over to the table and sat on Jim’s other side and next to a man who held his hand out to shake.

He introduced himself in a clipped tone, “Charles Augustus Milverton."


	7. Chapter 7

Sebastian shook the older man’s slightly sweaty hand and barely registered what he was saying. He knew he had to physically force himself to focus because apparently they were dining with a piranha tonight and he was well informed on just how sharp her teeth were. He unbuttoned his suit coat and sat back looking all around the room in the low, soft lighting.  He listened as the man next to him leaned across the table and shook Jim’s hand.

Sebastian thought the man reminded him of a glistening toad perched on a lily pad in some green pond and he wasn’t overly fond of how he was currently eyeing Jim like the juiciest fly. He followed the conversation wordlessly only speaking when the waiter attempted to fill his glass with a very fine wine and he declined it saying that he didn’t drink. He didn’t miss the flash of Mary’s eyes when he said this and he smiled to himself.

Jim had apparently sent ahead orders as to the food because the waiter never bothered with asking what they would like nor did he ever offer them a menu. It was very much his style, he’d pretend it to be a show of hosting yet he was actually making positive that no one there believed that they had any control. Sebastian forced his focus once more on the conversation.

“I do hope your rooms are to your liking Mary? Mr. Milverton?” Jim asked in honeyed tones.

“Oh, please call me Charles, I get truly sick to death of hearing that name as often as I do, and, yes, the place is magnificent.” he finished with a smile, if that was what one would call it, Sebastian thought it resembled more of a grimace.

“Yes, Jim, you’ve outdone yourself this time, I hope it wasn’t too much trouble?”  Mary intoned in a falsely sweet voice.

Jim laughed heartily and sipped his wine, “None at all my dear, none at all.”

Mary smiled as she too sipped her wine and Sebastian watched her as she took in every detail of the place. He realized that there was no one on earth that he hated as much as that woman and he wondered how he was supposed to choke down his dinner in her presence.

Their food then arrived with perfect timing as the small talk had dwindled and he knew that Jim never discussed business while his associates had empty stomachs. Sebastian, for his part, only took a few bites of his dinner despite having been famished earlier. He instead spent his time marking out the three men strategically placed around the room and he now knew exactly why he was here. The big dark man in a light suit at the booth opposite never really looked away from their table and his weapon was less than concealed.  The tall blond man at the bar in the corner didn't exactly pull off 'travelling business man'.  But the one who almost made him laugh was the lanky older man sitting with a perky young brunette at a small, candle lit table.  Sebastian was sure that he had the man marked and it wasn't until she shifted in her seat that he made the pistol strapped to her thigh beneath her snug, silken dress.  He was on his guard and he never quite let go of the sharp steak knife in his left hand throughout the course of the meal.

“So, Jim,” Mary began as she set her fork down on the plate, “I see you’ve re-enlisted the help of your _errand_ _boy_ , Moran. How very sweet.”

Jim smiled and it lacked any warmth, “Oh, he’s agreed to help me with one small thing, sometimes I find his mind enlightening and helpful when I feel stuck. You know the saying, ‘two heads are better than one’”, that had the exact effect that Jim had evidently been hoping for and Sebastian had to stifle a laugh at the look on Mary’s face.

Finally when their plates and cutlery had been cleared away Sebastian could feel the shift in the atmosphere and he could tell by the set of Jim’s jaw that he was ready to talk business. He sipped his cognac lazily and then sat back leisurely while looking Mary dead in the eye and addressing her as though no one else was at their table; Sebastian took to keeping an eye on the muscles in suits and the broad with something deadly between her legs along with watching  Milverton alternately.

“Mary, I know that you know why I’ve asked you and Charles here tonight. We needn’t bother with the small details at this moment I think, I only need to know if you are in a position to help me.”

She seemed to think about it for a moment and Sebastian watched out of the corner of his eye. He could almost pin-point the exact moment that she made up her mind. The fake smile slid from her features and it seemed like a shade was drawn behind her eyes as they became cold and unreadable.

Leaning forward she placed her arms on the table while intertwining her fingers, “Here’s the deal Jim, I can help you and I _want_ to help. Charles has agreed to help as well but we will both only do so under a few...provisions.”

Jim nodded and his eyes flicked briefly to the reptile sitting beside Sebastian and across from him. “I understand, dare I ask exactly what it is that you’d both like?”

Now she smiled widely and a ghost of a grin flitted across his features, Milverton seemed to move in closer as though he might actually want to have some input after thus far having said nothing more than his name for introductory purposes. He remained silent but Sebastian was intrigued.

“Oh, nothing that would put you out too far of course, you know how I value you, my dear. Along with the sum that we discussed last week I would simply like to add the protection of one person. I want to be assured that his name is never revealed and that he in no way at all is ever brought into danger.” she raised her eyebrows as she took another dainty sip from the flute, “I don’t think it’s unreasonable.”

Jim chuckled, “No, not at all...however….I’ll be the judge of that once I know more about the man in question. You understand, I’m certain…” he trailed off with just the slightest hint of a threat to his tone.

Her eyes were like ice. “Yes...yes, of course I do. One can never be too careful. I’m simply referring to...my-uh- fiancee. His name is Dr. John Watson.”

Jim laughed out loud, a genuine shout of shocked laughter and a few heads even turned in his direction. “John Watson? Is that so? What are you playing at?”

She looked properly angry now, “It is certainly no business of your’s, do I have your word?” She moved as though she was about to stand and leave if he said no and he waited a beat longer, “Yes, yes, what you have to offer me is invaluable and if that’s all you’re asking then I suppose I can oblige. And what about Charles?” he turned in his direction now and Sebastian got the feeling that he was watching two very dangerous predators size one another up and he sincerely hoped that there wouldn’t be a showdown here at their small table.

Mary was just about to speak when Milverton held up one long fingered hand to silence her, she looked taken aback. “Thank you _Ms_. Morstan, but I think I can handle this.” he never even looked at her as he spoke and she was livid. “Jim Moriarty. It seems that it will be a pleasure to do business with you and your-ah-associate? I dearly appreciate the opportunity.”

Jim didn’t respond nor did he even smile in acknowledgment which was a precious indicator of his obvious disdain for the slimy man at their table. “As our dear _lady_ here has already stated, in addition to the sum which we agreed upon I just need one small assurance from you. I can also tell you that its nothing you’d feel uncomfortable with.” he paused and sipped his blood red wine, Sebastian could feel his skin crawl, “I would ask you to assure me that when this breaks it will be only my networks that will gain full credit. It will not be broadcast by any other.”

Jim considered his request silently, “I can do that, I’m sorry if I don’t see the significance though.”

Milverton shrugged, “I don’t expect you to, also, my name and your’s shall never be uttered in the same sentence. No one shall ever know that we have conducted business together.”

Jim smiled now but it was a hard plastic mask, “Oh, of that I can assure you that we agree _wholeheartedly_ my friend.”

There was a beat of loaded awkward silence then as the various patrons were finishing their dinners and preparing to leave, it was very late and Sebastian couldn’t wait to get out of the stuffy place. Finally Milverton looked away from Jim’s gaze and Mary smiled in a relaxed way and Sebastian began to breathe again. Jim was the first to stand and then the other three all did the same.

They walked their guests to the lobby where there were handshakes (mostly) all around and promises of being in touch within the week. Jim and Sebastian left them as the lift doors closed and then they turned and headed for Jim’s private lift down the hall. The ride up was silent and tense, Jim was lost in thought and Sebastian was seething but he wasn’t stupid and he knew that his anger would have to wait until they were securely inside his private suite where he knew they wouldn’t be overheard.


	8. Chapter 8

When they stepped inside the lavish suite Sebastian immediately undid his tie and flung it on the table and without a word he went to the small and well stocked bar where he poured a healthy measure of scotch. He was seething and after having had nothing to drink with dinner he needed something to calm his nerve or he was afraid he would fly right off the handle. Once he finished the drink and refilled it he turned to find Jim standing a few feet behind him with his hands deep in his trouser pockets.

“You’re angry.” It was a statement not a question.

Sebastian laughed without humor, “Nah, I’ve been angry before and I can tell ya that this is much worse.” he took another gulp of his scotch.

Jim nodded but stayed where he was, “Do you want to talk?” his voice was low.

“No.” was all Sebastian responded and then turned around. He waited a moment and when he didn’t hear the click of Jim’s shoes on the marble floor he turned back around again. “Ya know what? I _do_ wanna talk about it.” he took the few steps toward Jim so that they were face to face, he could feel the alcohol in his veins now and he felt less irate and more articulate.

“How _dare_ you? How _fucking_ dare you put me in another situation with that..that...that twat!?” he nearly shouted.

Jim eyed him serenely which he found maddening, “You don’t know the whole story Sebastian.”

“Then fucking enlighten me, I’m all ears.”

“I needed help Sebastian and she is the only one capable of doing what I need.”

“Do you actually even hear the bollocks that comes out of your fucken mouth?”

“It’s the truth. Listen, I’ll tell you whatever you need to know if-if it’ll make you happy.”

Sebastian snorted at the word _"_ _happy"_  and set his empty snifter on the side table. “Yeah? Anything? Okay.” he tilted his head to one side, “What is she helping you with then?”

Jim swallowed and licked his lips once, “Getting to Janine.” The silence that followed was absolute and agonizing.

“ _Janine_?” Sebastian finally mumbled after what seemed like an eternity.

Jim nodded, “Yes, I’ve been tracking her movements for several months now and I know for absolutely certain of her location and I just need some help getting to her. Milverton’s services are strictly for my own benefit.”

Sebastian was incredulous and frankly he didn’t believe one word. “Can I ask you a question?”

Jim nodded wordlessly. “D’you think that you would even recognized the truth if it jumped out and bit you in the arse?!”

Jim smiled and it was all Sebastian could do not to punch him so he took both of his hands and grasped his own hair at the root and tugged as he paced away; Jim was going to drive him to insanity and he was honestly shocked that it hadn’t already happened. He took a deep breath and calmed himself with a major effort. Thankfully Sebastian possessed an otherworldly level of self control.

“She’s dead Jim, fucking _DEAD_! I know...I did it.” he trailed off and wondered why he was suddenly feeling deflated.

Jim was silent for a moment and then he took the few steps forward..tentatively...to stand in front of Sebastian. He placed a cold hand on his jaw and it was an oddly calming gesture however Sebastian had been pushed past the point of caring. Batting Jim’s hand away with more force than was probably necessary he turned away, “Fuck you. Don’t touch me and don’t pretend that you have good reasons for the shit you put me through.”

Jim was quiet. Sebastian had to finally turn around to be sure he was still in the room. “You know, she was planning to off you. I couldn’t let it happen.”

Jim nodded, “I did know that. Sebastian I learned a long time ago that just because we share DNA does not mean that we are the same, in fact we are remarkably different. But, I regret to inform you that she is not actually dead. I only wish it were otherwise.”

Sebastian’s head was buzzing, he nodded solemnly, “I understand. I will do only what you need of me and then after it is all settled I think I’ll take a holiday. I’ve been meaning to get away.”

Again Jim nodded and ran a hand distractedly through his sleek dark hair, he was obviously bothered and it was strange for Sebastian to see, so much so that he momentarily forgot his anger and just watched the man. The cold light from the moon was filtering in through the floor length windows and casting an eerie glow on Jim’s silhouette. He was made to appear otherworldly and ethereal. Sebastian was convinced that if he even dared to blink that Jim would just evaporate into the atmosphere.

“Jim-”

“There is actually no reason on this planet that I should expect your loyalty Sebastian. You have flawlessly...so to speak...carried out every task which I have put to you.” he paused and slowly made his way toward the bar, his heels clicking with an echo on the floor. “Yet- well, yet I feel that I have compensated you as well as anyone in your position could ever hope for. Don’t you think?”

Sebastian made to answer the rhetorical question because he felt that Jim was being more unfair than usual but he was cut off by Jim speaking once again. “I know that you fancy yourself an advisor in some sense but I can assure you that, although I may occasionally heed your advice that in no way at all do I _need_ you. You are not entitled to every scrap of knowledge which I come across and I do not need to explain myself to you. Do you understand?” he had stopped speaking and turned to face Sebastian fully.

Sebastian was hearing the words echoing around his skull and he still felt that he was entirely unable to process them. “You’re right, beyond a doubt, you are right. I am not entitled to any information which you don’t think is necessary to my carrying out your orders.”

Jim was smiling again and suddenly Sebastian didn’t feel as angry as he’d been only a moment before. He didn’t know if he’d ever understand it but the man did something to him, somehow he was capable of infuriating him, confusing him beyond belief, distracting him to the point of danger, blinding him to his less favorable qualities and yet at the same time he was so in love and completely, absurdly smitten by the man so that all these things combined to keep him coming back every time. He sighed heavily and ran a hand through his own messed hair while closing his tired eyes for a moment.

“Ya know what Jim?” his voice was quieter but stronger somehow and Jim’s smile faltered, “I don’t expect ya to give me every detail. You are clever and that is why you are as successful as you are. I’m sorry, I was out of line.” he slowly moved toward where Jim was still standing with his hands in his trouser pockets. As he reached him he smiled genuinely and extended his hands asking silently if Jim could forgive his outburst, he was answered by Jim moving the few steps forward and allowing Sebastian to wrap his arms around his waist.

Sebastian leaned his head down and softly kissed the top of Jim’s head while whispering into his hair, “I’m sorry…” Jim didn’t move or say anything, he just allowed the embrace and in his own way he was apologizing as well. Sebastian leaned back a bit and looked into Jim’s face, his eyes couldn’t help wandering low to his mouth and lingering there, he could already feel his pulse quickening and he knew that Jim felt it too. The human body was a very telling machine and Sebastian wouldn’t have wanted it any other way.

He only hesitated a second longer then his mouth was on Jim’s and he’d closed his eyes to savor the moment. It consistently amazed him how soft and gentle Jim could be at times and yet this was the same man whom Sebastian had heard order the deaths of lesser men and women and on one occasion he was the one pulling the trigger and Sebastian was pretty sure that he’d _never_ forget the look in his eyes that day nor would he ever _want_ to forget the way he looked as he straightened his impeccable suit coat and held a hand out to Sebastian for a towel to wipe away the blood that had spattered on to his sleeves and coat.

Sebastian bit at his lip and pulled him in closer and felt as Jim’s hands moved up and wound tightly in his hair while tugging just a little. Both men were breathing heavily and neither seemed particularly willing to end the kiss or the embrace and Sebastian found himself doing something he hadn’t done in ages; sinking to his knees on the marble floor he steadied himself using Jim’s hips. Jim rested his hands on Sebastian’s broad shoulders and undid the fly of his trousers.

Licking his lips just once to moisten them, Sebastian leaned forward and slid his mouth over the head of Jim’s erect cock and swirled his tongue along the length while gently sucking.  He moved his hands to the man's arse and squeezed firmly and listened with pleasure as Jim sucked in air through his teeth when Sebastian had taken him all the way in and then stayed that way for a moment. Slowly and wetly he moved his head back and licked and tongued his throbbing shaft, he could feel his own hard-on rubbing painfully against his trousers and he tried to ignore it and focus only on Jim.

He moved that way, forward and backward several times until Jim tugged at his hair and urged him to move faster. Sebastian moved back and let Jim’s cock slip out of his mouth letting the tip linger at his saliva slicked lips while pushing the material of his trousers even lower.  Then he dipped his head and kissed and licked the skin around his inner thigh and then moved lower to his balls where he paused for a second and then at Jim’s urging he took them both into his mouth and sucked gently but with enough pressure to make Jim cry out. A few minutes of that and he was sure Jim wouldn't last so he moved back to his cock where he continued to suck and lick until Jim was coming and made weak in the knees so that he almost fell into Sebastian.  His pleasure was so forceful that he couldn't even cry out so he just held on tightly to Sebastian's head until it was over.

Later that night Sebastian laid in bed with Jim, naked and exhausted, tucked into his side with his perpetually cold feet against Sebastian’s shins and he thought and he thought and then he thought some more. Something was happening and even though he’d told Jim he was sorry for his earlier outburst, he didn’t mean one word of it. Jim wasn’t the only one adept at acting, Sebastian spent nearly all his life pretending to be something or someone else so he’d learned a long time ago to play his cards close to his chest and he had resolved never to allow himself to lose control like that again.


	9. Chapter 9

The following morning, after not sleeping for more than an hour- at most, Sebastian quietly snuck from the bed and took a shower before the sun had even risen. When he’d finished and dressed in dark trousers and crisp white shirt-minus a tie-he went and put coffee on and found an assortment of newspapers on the hall table. Picking one up at random he went and sat at the small dining table and leafed through the pages while waiting for Jim to stir.

The sun was just beginning to peek through the low cloud cover when he heard the soft, muffled sounds of Jim as he moved about the bedroom and bathroom as he showered and dressed. Sebastian got up and turned the kettle on and made himself another cup of coffee before Jim even emerged. When he did finally come into the small kitchen area he was dressed, as usual, in a perfect dark blue tailored suit with a shirt of the palest pink and a tie that simply shouldn’t have looked so damn good on him but did.  Sebastian sighed and smiled at the man by way of greeting.

Once Jim had made his tea and grabbed a paper he came and sat across from Sebastian at the table, he looked tired even though Sebastian knew he’d slept through the night. This lifestyle seemed to be getting the better of him, Sebastian knew for damn sure that it was getting to _him_ finally so, why should Jim be any different? He set his paper aside and watched Jim as he turned the pages of his own slowly.

After a while he couldn’t take the silence any longer so he spoke. “What’s next?”  he asked abruptly.

Jim sipped his tea, blowing on it first to cool the liquid, “We leave.” he replied simply.

Sebastian crossed his arms over his chest and leaned back in his chair, “Aye, and where, dare I ask, are we headed?”

“London.”

* * *

 

Later that day they were once again buckled into their seats on Jim’s private jet headed for London. If Sebastian was honest, he wasn’t looking forward to landing. He hated London, yes, he’d lived there for most of his adult life but he despised the city. Apart from the obvious hellish city life, it seemed that nothing good ever happened when he and Jim were in London together. The knot in his stomach seemed to tighten a little more as the minutes ticked by.

When they finally landed and deplaned it had just begun to sprinkle and the wind seemed to be picking up and, although he wished they were anywhere else in the world, Sebastian was grateful to be back on solid ground. Jim didn’t wait around for long he briskly made for the idling black sedan and Sebastian followed thinking of the warm, dry interior. When they slid into the back Sebastian was slightly startled to see the Frenchman in the driver’s seat and Jim was already speaking to him in rapid French.

He slid his sunglasses on to hide his eyes and looked out the tinted window as the car began moving away from the air strip. He had not forgotten about his plan to look into this guy a bit but he figured that it could wait until after this hellish job.

Jim had his mobile out and was texting rapidly but his free hand slid across the leather seat and grasped Sebastian’s firmly.

For some reason Sebastian expected to be dropped at his flat but when the car turned and headed in the complete opposite direction he realized where they were heading and sat up straighter in his seat. He slid his hand inside his coat and felt the reassuring coldness of his gun against his chest.

He could feel Jim’s eyes on him. “Relax,” he said quietly, “I just fancied a drive past.”

Sebastian’s face could’ve been carved from stone, “Why today, Jim?” and then it clicked. “Holmes has something to do with this business?” Jim’s silence was all the answer he needed.

He sighed and paid very close attention then. The more information that was revealed the worse this job seemed and it was all he could do not to shout with frustration. It didn’t take long and the sedan was slowly moving down Baker Street and past the brick fronted flats and the black gates. The street was unremarkable in every single sense and yet Sebastian couldn’t stop the clammy feel of his hands and the heightened sense of awareness that always preceded disaster. He could almost feel the years slipping from his life.

The dingy street was precisely as it had always been, pedestrians milling about or hailing cabs, cars parked all along the curb and not a sign of Holmes or any other less than desirable person at the moment. The car began to pick up speed again and they headed off across town to Jim’s place. Sebastian didn’t even bother to ask, it wasn’t worth the snide comment that he was almost guaranteed in response, he decided.

They were dropped at the door of his building and both slid from the car without a word and headed for the building. Not for the first time Sebastian found himself wondering what it must be like inside Jim’s head and he came up with the same answer he always did: _chaotic_.

Inside the flat Jim tossed his keys and glasses on a small table and went straight for his office, never once did he even look to see if Sebastian was still with him. He was but that wasn’t the point, Sebastian hated when he went into overdrive like this and nothing else mattered and now that one of the Holmes brothers was involved in...whatever this was...Sebastian just knew that things were only bound to get worse before they got better. He sighed and went to the kitchen to turn on the kettle and nearly tripped and broke his neck over the two leather cases, _his_ leather cases which presumably held quite a few of his personal possessions. _Jesus_ _Christ_.

“Jim!” No answer.

He tried again, “JIM!”, still nothing.

He pinched the bridge of his nose between his thumb and forefinger before turning and heading off toward the office where he’d disappeared only moments before. Gently pushing the door open he found Jim sitting at the desk and furiously tapping at the keys of his laptop. He couldn’t help taking a moment and admiring the man, infuriating as he was, he was perfect in Sebastian’s eyes. Perfect in the sense that regardless of what happened between the two, no matter how many times they fell out, he just knew deep in his bones that they’d end up side by side again. Sebastian got annoyed often with the way the man operated but he also learned ages ago how to cope because it was evident that Jim couldn’t or, more likely, _wouldn’t_ change and he didn’t care so _he_ had chosen to bend. Its just the way they were wired, it was how they were meant to fit.

Sighing loudly he stepped into the room and Jim finally looked up, the dark circles under his eyes more prominent than Sebastian had seen recently. He crossed his arms over his chest and leaned against the wall, “Something you want to tell me, boss?” he asked sarcastically.

Jim arched his dark eyebrows, “Nothing I’m aware of currently.”

“My bags? In the hall? You-you _a_ _re_ responsible for those, right?” 

Jim was silent a moment and then comprehension dawned on his face and he waved a hand at Sebastian dismissively. “Yes, yes. Of course  I am. You weren’t honestly planning to go back to that hole you were living in, were you?” 

Sebastian snorted, “It may not have been posh, like this place, but it was home Jim. You can’t make decisions like that, about _my_ life, without talkin’ to me first.” 

He was leaning back in his chair now and surveying Sebastian shrewdly. “What would you have said if I’d asked?”

Sebastian thought about it, “I-I dunno. But, I mean it. Ya don’t own me, you pay me for my services but you don’t own me. Understand?” 

Jim didn’t look nearly as abashed as he should have, Sebastian thought. “I understand your statement, yes. It doesn’t change the fact, however, that I need you here. At least for the time being.” he finished and went back to his computer with a thoughtful look on his face.

This was one of those moments then, he’d just nod and allow this to happen and he’d eventually be okay with it because, in reality, this _was_ where he wanted to be but he just needed it to be on his terms and if not on his terms then he needed Jim to know and believe that he was properly angry about it at the very least. He stood watching him for a few more minutes and when he was sure that Jim had gone back to thoroughly ignoring him he turned and left, shouting over his shoulder as he did, “I’m going to the pub! I may not come back.” no answer, as expected.

He did go to the pub but contrary to his threat, he did return to the flat several hours later. Nothing had changed, no lamps had been switched on, his luggage had not been moved and evidently Jim had never even emerged from his office. He checked his wrist for the time, it was nearly midnight. He kicked off his shoes in the hall and hung up his coat before padding down to Jim’s office where a yellow glow was emanating from the cracked door.

As he approached he was made immediately aware that there was no sound from within, no clicking of keyboard keys, no ruffle of papers, complete and utter silence. He no longer felt the enjoyable buzz of the lager in his veins, the adrenaline cancelled any slight drunkenness he might have been feeling only moments before. His footsteps became silent and he gently nudged the door open further so he could poke his head around the door. 

He honestly couldn’t say what he had been expecting but it wasn’t what he saw. Thankfully. Jim was asleep. Out cold with his head on the keyboard in front of him. He let out a huge breath and stepped all the way into the room, still trying not to make too much noise but feeling much lighter now that he saw Jim was alright. As he approached the desk a floorboard creaked under his foot and he stopped, waiting. Jim stirred but only slightly and Sebastian waited only a second longer before continuing. When he reached the man he had all intentions of picking him up and carrying him to his overly plush bed but Jim awoke as soon as Sebastian touched him. 

“Wh-what?!? Don’t touch me!” his words were slurred and edgy from sleep and Sebastian didn’t step away. 

“Jim. Jim, it’s me, Sebastian.” he kept his hands on the man’s shoulders.

“What? What’re you doing?” 

“I’m back from the pub and I’m taking you to bed so that you don’t wake up tomorrow with a permanent indent of keys on your cheek. C’mon, off to bed.” 

Jim sat back then and stretched, his white shirt was wrinkled and had come out of his trousers so when he reached his arms above his head a bit of his skin was visible and Sebastian bit his lip in restraint. 

“C’mon Jim, its late.”

Jim stood and cracked his knuckles. “Are you coming?” he asked, his voice was sleepy but his words had a meaning, a meaning which Sebastian didn’t miss. 

He advanced quickly and grabbed Jim’s face between his large hands and kissed him. He kissed him deeply and meaningfully and Jim lazily responded by wrapping his arms around Sebastian’s slim waist and pulling him close. The kiss deepend in intensity and in a few moments both men were breathless and smiling while they rested their foreheads together.

“Mmmmm, you do taste simply scandalous.” 

Sebastian laughed, “You’re a pain in the arse, c’mon” then he grabbed Jim’s hands and tugged him from the room and toward the bedroom.


	10. Chapter 10

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> "I'm coming for you and I'm making war"

They laid entangled in the other’s limbs in the plush and ridiculously soft bed and simply kissed and touched one another. Sebastian had lost complete track of time as they had explored one another so thoroughly, now they were both exhausted but neither was willing to go to sleep and allow it to end.

Sebastian was falling in love again with the gooseflesh that arose on Jim’s body when he trailed his fingers gently over his spine or along his inner thigh and the way Jim would shudder when he did these little things. He currently had his head tucked into Jim’s neck and was kissing and nibbling at his collarbone while he had his other hand on Jim’s erect cock and Jim tilted his head back and away to allow full access.

“Sebastian?” Jim mumbled pleasantly.

“Hmmmm?” was all that he was capable of responding as his mouth was currently engaged in licking and kissing at Jim’s neck.

“No, Sebastian, stop. Come _here_ , I need to say something to you and I need your full attention.” he made his intent even more clear when he tugged sharply at the short hair on Sebastian’s head and brought his face level with his own.

“ _Fuck_! That hurt. What is it that’s so damn important and couldn’t wait until I’d finished?” Sebastian asked in annoyance as he massaged the spot on his scalp that had been violated.

Jim laid back and looked up at the ceiling as he joined in rubbing the spot on Sebastian’s head where he’d tugged his hair. He looked thoughtful but troubled and Sebastian moved in a little closer while wrapping his arms around the man’s waist. “Okay, what is it?” Sebastian had gone into protective and worried mode and he didn’t want to let go of Jim’s body, his solid warmth against his own body was reassuring.

“I just-I know how you’re feeling, I know what you’re thinking. The last time Janine was involved-”

“I nearly fucking lost you-” Sebastian interjected venomously.

Jim sighed an almost imperceptible breath before answering, “I understand Sebastian. What you don’t understand is… I have no choice here. If I don’t destroy her first then it is almost certain that she will destroy me.”

“Mmhmm. I _do_ get that.”

“No, dear, I don’t think you understand completely.” he shifted so he was in more of a sitting position and he kissed Sebastian on his forehead and his deep worry lines, “She has something, evidence, of something I did when I was younger. She has everything she would need to send me to the guillotine, so to speak.”

Sebastian had edged himself up so he was leaning against the headboard too. “What does she have proof of and exactly what kind of proof are we talking about?”

Jim had taken Sebastian’s hand in his now and was tracing patterns on the back with his thumb. “You know the worst of me my love, of that I have no doubt, but-”

Sebastian took his hand back and forcibly made him lie down as he climbed on top of him, holding him firmly in place with his own body weight. “I’m not fucking around here, I don’t care if you think that you have some dark secret and if you think I’m gonna scurry off like a spineless fool. So, tell me, what has the bitch got on you and how do I fucken end her and the threat she poses.”

Jim’s eyes were wide with amusement and he rested his cold hands on Sebastian’s naked thighs as the man spoke, sending a chill down Sebastian’s spine.

“Mmmm. Always so combative, I think that’s what I love best about you.” he took a deep breath before continuing, “When I was just a lad, still in primary school, I didn’t have many friends and I didn’t get on with my family either. Especially my cousin, on my mum’s side. Richard.” Jim paused and his eyes seemed far away, like he was reliving long distant events and Sebastian suddenly hated it. “Richard and I were the same age and he attended the same school as I. He was always a part of the cool crowd and he was well liked. He and his mates had a favorite hobby and that nearly always involved me and some fresh hell that they’d devise. I hated them so thoroughly and I would always write to Janine at her school and complain about him. She was really lovely back then and we were very close. I would tell her all the horrid things I had imagined happening to Richie and his mates and she would write back and tell me to stay strong.” he paused here and Sebastian reached out and stroked his dark hair where it laid on the pillow.

Taking a deep breath he continued, “During our summer holiday of that same year I found out that he was going to come and stay with us in our house on the sea. I had written to Janine immediately, I was horrified. I couldn’t _believe_ that he was going to destroy my holiday as well. He was even more horrible to me there, he would do things like take my books and maps and throw them in the sea and then when I’d get angry and hit him he would have me in trouble by my mum. He just got worse and worse and I was miserable.” he paused again.

“I’m still listening my love.”

Jim smiled, “Well...Richard had an... _accident_...that summer. He was always so reckless and he looked for danger so, really, it came as no surprise that he’d tumbled from that cliff and landed in a broken heap at the bottom of the rocky ravine. The only person who knew the truth was Janine.”

Sebastian sat back and ran his hands through his own hair now. _Fuck_! He thought, if this cold case is brought to light Jim will hang without a doubt and it depended on just how much evidence Janine had in her possession. “Okay...okay. So, Janine has your letters, correct?”

Jim nodded. “What else has she got? Because letters from a small, bullied boy from nearly twenty-five years ago will not be nearly enough to seal your fate.”

Jim’s eyes were as dark as Sebastian had ever seen them. “She has my complete confession. In my journal.” seeing the look on Sebastian’s face he continued hastily, “I was only a small boy! I was twelve years old and I had no idea that writing it in a journal would be a bad idea.”

Sebastian couldn’t help rolling his eyes, the most dangerous man in London was apparently a stupid, scared boy at one point in his life. Who knew? Okay, he could handle this, this was not the worst thing he’d ever handled before and he had experience with Janine...to say the least.

He leaned down then and kissed Jim lightly on his cold lips, “Okay, this is nothing. I can handle this _alone_.”

Jim closed his eyes, “She’s gone to Sherlock Holmes.”

Sebastian felt like he was falling, the bottom had surely gone out of his world and he was spinning through space and the atmosphere. He leaned down then and rested his forearms on either side of Jim’s head and hovered there with his face just inches from the man below him, “D’you remember, oh, I dunno, ten years ago or more when we were in New York City?” he asked and didn’t wait for an answer but the look on Jim’s face told him all he needed. “We were so fucken stupid! We could’ve gotten killed, d’you know that?”

Jim chuckled, “Yeah, we were really daft. I don’t see what this has to do with the present, though.”

“Nah, I don’t suppose so but, ya gotta know that I fucken love you, right?”

Jim laughed, truly laughed now, “‘ _Love_ ’? Yeah, I suppose it must be, eh?”

Sebastian sighed but a smile was on his lips, “Oh, someday I swear I’m gonna kick your scrawny arse, thoroughly, maybe when we retire.” he paused thoughtfully, “Just like in New York, I’ll do whatever you fucken need from me, got it?”

Jim reached out and caressed his jaw gently with a cold hand, “I get it, my tiger.”

Sebastian then leaned back down and placed both large hands on Jim’s face, he brought his lips within inches of his and grinned, “God fucken help me, I’m in deep,” he said, his brogue becoming thicker. But, he found, he didn’t really care, not when it boiled right down to it. He’d sell his soul to this devil every God damn time, he knew.

Jim responded by wrapping his arms around Sebastian’s solid frame and holding tightly as they kissed one another deeply and with more passion than either of them could ever remember. It might’ve been the declaration of love, it might’ve been pure lust but it didn’t really matter, not to Sebastian and certainly not to Jim whose body was already responding to the stimulation.

Sebastian slid his hands low, to Jim’s thighs and never stopped kissing him in the process. The man infected him, no matter how hard he tried to break away, he knew, he’d always be back here, in his arms. It was okay, it was great, in fact. He understood that there were far worse ways to die.

He moved his mouth lower then, to Jim’s neck and down to his collar bone and then lower to his shoulder and then to his bicep and his tongue traced the arteries, the life giving blood as it flowed through his veins and Sebastian imagined that he could hear the man’s pulse beating in time with his own. He marveled at the way Jim’s skin seemed to glow in the pale moonlight and it seemed he couldn’t possibly be real so, Sebastian decided to find out.

The sharp intake of breath from Jim when he firmly grabbed his cock in his right hand and stroked it a few times caused Sebastian’s breath to quicken in response. He slid his whole body even lower and continued kissing as he went and he savored the way Jim responded, arching his body closer to Sebastian’s, silently pleading for more. Sebastian was only too eager to give as much as Jim was willing to take.

He rolled his tongue slowly down Jim’s abdomen and then to the small bones that the protruded from his hips. From there he moved his head slowly across and over to lick the skin around Jim’s cock, he glanced up once to see Jim biting his lower lip in restraint. Then he slid the hand that had been on his cock lower and gently massaged his arse and slid a finger and then two slowly inside which he then followed with his tongue. He licked at the sensitive skin around Jim’s arse and as he kept the two fingers inside of him he licked and sucked at the tight opening and he could hear the soft, pleasurable moans from the man above him.

He continued to lick as he alternated between sucking Jim’s cock and his arse while keeping his two fingers deep inside of the man, gently pressing his prostate and causing him to arch his back. Finally, after what felt like an eternity he moved back up so that his face was level with Jim’s and he kissed him on his throat and then his jaw and then he took his own rock-hard cock and slid inside Jim’s saliva-slicked hole. Jim nearly gasped and he rolled his hips forward accepting Sebastian all the way in and Sebastian groaned with the pleasure of it.  He moved slowly and pressed his body forward, into Jim, with determination and he kept his eyes wide open so he didn’t miss a single thing. He wanted to watch Jim’s face as he fucked him, he wanted to see the look on his face just before he came, he wanted and _needed_ to know the kind of mind numbing pleasure he was capable of producing. He was not disappointed.

He moved like that for an interminable amount of time and he realized that it was just the two of them, no one else mattered or existed in this moment. Just them. And he moved, in and out slowly and with meaning, each thrust forward was a testament of his love and each time he moved his hips back was how he slowly and determinedly showed his adoration and Jim, for his part, responded by gasping and grasping at Sebastian’s sweaty shoulders and back and the roiling muscles there. Sebastian thought he could feel blood oozing from the scratches but that only encouraged him to move with more agonizingly blissful precision.

Finally he knew he wouldn’t last much more and he abandoned any attempt at rhythm and he thrust forward with such force that all that could be heard was the gasping and panting of the two men accompanied by their sweat-dampened skin coming together and it didn’t take much until they both felt it, the white hot climax and then the slowing of their breath as they laid together, Sebastian on top of Jim and they were sticky with sweat and saliva and fluids but neither had an inclination to move. In a way Sebastian felt that things were beginning to shift and change so he decided to take advantage of this moment, when Jim was his, _fully_ _his,_ and he felt that it was important, somewhere in his bones, that he held on to this moment. Then they slept.


	11. Chapter 11

_“You can’t possibly think for **one** second that you mean anything to him! Please, Sebastian, tell me you aren’t that thick!” _

_It was cold and damp along the Thames. Rain was beginning to spatter their faces and her dark hair was being whipped around her face. The dark and tumultuous rain clouds were an accurate depiction of Sebastian’s swirling thoughts. She was heartbreakingly beautiful but she was a viper in Chanel and he knew that. He knew that he couldn’t trust her but right now, right here, he wanted to. Her words made sense and, he asked himself, who could possibly know James Moriarty better than his twin sister?_

_“Janine I-” he broke off, he didn’t know, he had no idea what he believed or thought anymore. “I- I don’t know! I don’t know what you want from me but I just-I…” his voice trailed away and was drowned by the wind as it persisted._

_She took a step forward, the wind blew her black wool coat about her knees, “Sebastian! I love you! That’s all you need to know and understand and I am trying to protect you, he’s a monster!”_

_He was beginning to wonder how he hadn’t realized before that he was surrounded by monsters. He was so confused and his head was spinning, he felt like tearing his hair out and screaming at the top of his lungs._

_She was right in front of him and her dark, round eyes were shining with unshed tears. She was pleading with him, pleading that he listen to her and understand that she only loved him and that when the dust settled they’d go away together. No one would ever find them and they’d be safe, finally. She blinked and then reached up, standing on her toes and kissed him. She tasted salty from the tears running down her face and he knew that his eyes weren’t dry either. Then he heard it, the unmistakable sound of shoes crunching the gravel and he spun around but it was too late and all was blackness._

* * *

 

“Sebastian?” he felt a cold hand on his cheek and he heavily opened his eyes to see Jim looking down at him with a worried expression. “Are you alright love?”

He sat up and was confused, the dream had felt so real. Reaching a hand to his forehead he wiped at the cold sweat that had beaded there. Jim was silent as he watched him try to get his bearings and he was grateful that he didn’t ask any questions just yet. He leaned forward pressing his palms into his eye sockets with force making tiny stars pop behind his lids. He could feel the sting of tears that he would never shed.

“W-what was it my dear?” Jim finally asked in a quiet voice.

Sebastian almost didn’t want to respond but he decided that that would do no good for anyone. “It-it was just a dream-a nightmare- really.” he hesitated, “Jim, are you- are you quite sure about this? Its just-I fear that she is far cleverer than we are giving her credit for, I mean, we would do well to remember that she is your sister, your twin sister and she is far and away the only one capable of knowing your heart and mind.”

Jim smiled wanly at the last comment and laid a hand on Sebastian’s where he rested it on top of the duvet. “I understand your trepidation, truly, I do.” he paused and gave Sebastian the look, the one that meant, ‘I hear what you’re saying but it will ultimately make no difference.’

Sebastian closed his eyes, “I get it.  It doesn’t make a damn bit of difference what I say, does it?” he asked needlessly.

Jim shook his head. He sighed and moved to fling his legs over the edge of the bed. “I understand. What now?” he asked with his back to Jim as he stood naked alongside the bed and stretched.

“I’m going to see Mary today.”

Sebastian didn’t even turn around, “Of course you are. And where will I be?”

“With me, but unseen.” Sebastian nodded and headed off to shower and dress.

* * *

 

Later that day, around noon, he and Jim made their way to a tiny cafe on a busy street in the heart of London. It was the kind of place that no one looked at twice, the awning outside was stained and faded from the weather and the inside wasn’t much better. The two men parted company long before they were within sight of the place however and Sebastian found an equally dismal place across the street and a few doors down which afforded him a perfect view of the impending meeting. He curtly ordered a coffee from the young, disinterested girl with purple hair who waited on him and returned to watching Jim and their surroundings.

He was sitting there for nearly a quarter of an hour when he watched Mary arrive, she glanced up and down the street several times and checked her mobile before pulling open the glass door of the restaurant. She disappeared momentarily and then he saw her blonde head once again as she approached Jim’s table. The two embraced briefly and then both sat and glanced at their paper menus. He had to stifle a laugh as he imagined the look on Jim’s face when he read the limited menu and the items available which he wouldn’t _dream_ of eating.

He had been splitting his time between observing the surroundings and watching Jim and Mary across the street for nearly thirty minutes when he heard a voice. It was a voice that he had been quite sure, until recently, that he’d never hear again and while he still wasn’t sure how he’d felt about that he did know that right here, right now, was certainly not a good omen.

“You look well, Sebastian Moran.”

He turned his head slowly and an ironic grin spread across his face and he had to stop himself from sneering, “And you,” he responded as he ran his gaze down the length of her body, “are looking exceedingly well...for a corpse. Please,” he gestured to the empty bistro chair across from him, “have a seat Janine.”

She smiled widely and accepted his offer, “You are always so gracious and gentlemanly.”

“I’m really not. So, how’s death been treating you, love?” he sipped at his cooling coffee and watched her while never truly taking his eyes from where Jim sat.

She crossed her legs and smoothed her dress over her knees, “Oh, ya know, kinda dull. I honestly don’t know how my brother does it, it’s exhausting to not exist. Miss?” she hailed their waitress and ordered a chai tea before continuing, “So, tell me, how have you been? Really?” she reached a hand across the table to lay it on top of his, her slender fingers, not accidentally caressing the gold ring on his pinky.

His blood boiled in response to her touch and he yanked his hand away, “What do you want Janine? I’m rather busy at the moment, make it quick, eh?”

She looked annoyed but she shook her long dark hair over her shoulders and looked him square in the eye, “Tell your boss that if he wants what I think he wants that he could fuck right off because the only way he will ever lay his hands on the information is when he succeeds in offing me, understand?”

Sebastian couldn’t help the smile that spread across his face and he found he was enjoying himself even more when he saw the look of annoyance on her beautiful features and the fire in her dark brown eyes.

He leaned forward and interlocked his fingers, “Is that an invitation then? I can never rest easily with a job unfinished, ya know?” he smiled even wider revealing all of his perfect white teeth and he saw her visibly recoil and then shake herself as she smiled cooly at him in return.

“Look at you Sebastian. You really are daft enough to follow him into hell, aren’t you?” her tone was patronizing and he suddenly hated her all over again and realized that he couldn’t wait until Jim gave him the order to finish her _and_ Morstan. He glanced over his shoulder and saw Jim and Mary standing and kissing each other on the cheek as they said ‘goodbye’. Sebastian stood abruptly and threw some bills on the small table as he moved to Janines side.

He stood there and looked down on her, “I will be coming for you and I promise you won’t enjoy it _nearly_ as much as the last time. I don’t make the same mistakes twice darling.” he leaned down then and kissed her on the cheek, very close to her ear and with one hand holding her head firmly in place, he twined his long fingers in her silky hair, “James Moriarty will feel like the opening act when I’m finished with you.” he let her go and walked away to meet Jim without even a backwards glance but he felt that he knew the Moriarty’s well enough to know that he’d left her seething.

He and Jim didn’t speak the entire way back to his flat and when they arrived home Jim headed straight for his office. He was in that type of mood...again...apparently so Sebastian didn’t bother trying to talk to him. It was getting late and he kept checking his watch while Jim never emerged from behind the closed door of his office. He had just decided that he was only going to give the man another five minutes when he heard the knob click and the door swung open. Sebastian stood quickly and looked over to where Jim had stopped, seemingly startled to find Sebastian still there.

“We need to talk.” Sebastian told him and he hoped his tone was urgent enough to convey his meaning.

“Indeed…” Jim responded with raised eyebrows, “what seems to be troubling you?”

“Janine-”

Jim chuckled, “Ah, yes, did you two have a nice chat this afternoon?”

Sebastian tilted his head, “W-what? You knew?”

“Of course I knew, that was the whole purpose of today darling, sometimes the rats need encouragement to crawl from their stinking holes.”

“S-so...what did you learn then?”  Sebastian asked haltingly as he tried to catch up.

Jim stuffed both hands in his trouser pockets, “I learned that Janine keeps highly detailed records and she, of course, guards them with her life which is why any information which I seek can be found on a memory stick. The memory stick is never off her person. I learned also that Janine can simply not resist the temptation to gloat, most especially when she believes that she has beaten me. Above all however, I learned,” he crossed the room in a few languid strides so that he was standing just in front of Sebastian, “that she still gets under your skin in the very worst way. How telling.”

Sebastian swallowed hard as Jim studied him with those keen, dark eyes and he had to look away. The silence stretched on until Sebastian could hardly stand another minute and then Jim spoke again and Sebastian was thankful.

“Well, she is rather interesting, to her credit but we’ve got her now my love. I have one of my best people presently employed infiltrating her inner sanctum. It won’t be long now.”

Sebastian was shocked, “Which of your people are on this? You know that you can’t really trust any of them.”

“Oh, relax, it’s someone that I feel certain you would approve of.” he made to turn away but Sebastian grabbed his arm firmly not caring about the venomous look he received.

“Tell me who it is and I’ll be the judge of that.”

Jim hesitated, “Oh fine, you’re like a dog with a bone sometimes. Irene Adler. _The_ _woman_.”

“Jim-” Sebastian was even more startled than he’d imagined he’d be.

“She’s got herself into a spot of trouble with some Russians and I have graciously offered to assist her if she would be willing to do one small thing for me.”  Jim explained in a bored tone.

Sebastian sighed, “And? What is the small thing then?”

“Get close to my dearest sister. Janine won’t be able to resist the charms of Ms. Adler, I assure you. Once she has taken her into her confidence it will only be a matter of time until I get the information which I desire and then I will lend a helping hand to Ms. Adler and you, my love, will have the chance to finish the job which you failed at previously. We will all get our happy endings.” he paused and looked thoughtful, “with the exception of Janine, of course.”

Sebastian was silent and Jim stood watching him again, though with less intensity than before and after a while he rolled his eyes and turned toward the door. “I’m starving, are you going to join me for a bite?”

He was still trying to process the whole plan that had just been laid out before him and his head was spinning but he wasn’t letting Jim go out alone so he made his legs move and followed him from the flat. He wondered how much blood was going to be shed before this whole damn mess was finished.


	12. Chapter 12

The days that followed were weird and troubling for Sebastian. They went about their daily lives as usual, Jim would wake up and go to his office to work and Sebastian would tend to his own things but he was beginning to feel like a caged animal and without fail he would need to get out of the flat every day by mid-afternoon. He was uncomfortable with Jim’s plan and he didn’t entirely trust the woman so he frequently found himself spending at least part of his day following Irene and it seemed she was also living as dull of an existence as it was possible to do.

Finally after nearly a week of this he decided to invest his time in something more worthwhile. He contacted his associate in intelligence and asked him to look in to a small matter that had been bothering him for some time now.  He was assured that it would be no problem and they'd be in contact shortly, he was not disappointed. One day not long after, Sebastian received a call over breakfast. They had been having tea and toast and Jim was reading one of the various newspapers that he read daily while Sebastian mindlessly browsed the internet. His mobile startled him as it vibrated loudly near his elbow on the table and he glanced briefly at Jim before answering it and leaving the room, he kept his eyes averted as he did.

He walked around the corner and into the other room but he knew that he was still very much in earshot of Jim so he kept his responses short. Mostly he spoke one word and then ended the call with a “thanks.” before returning to breakfast. When he sat back down it was impossible to ignore the extremely pointed look he was receiving from across the table, and he _was_ trying.

After about a minute he finally looked up and caught Jim’s eye. “Yes?” he asked, he was annoyed.

“Care to enlighten me about your caller?”

He pretended to think about it for a moment before answering, “Uhhhh-nope.” then he glanced back to his computer screen but his eyes were out of focus as the conversation from a few minutes ago played in his head on repeat.

_“He doesn’t exist, Bas. He’s isn’t anywhere to be found; the man could essentially be a ghost. In fact,”_   here Sebastian had left the room and had muttered a short, “uh-huh” to encourage him to continue.

_“He is dead. He died nearly twenty-five years ago._ ” there was a pause, _“His name is Richard. Brook. He died in an accident at a family home while on holiday when he was only a lad and there was suspected foul play but nothing was ever ruled conclusively. I’m sorry mate, I wish I could be more help.”_

Sebastian had answered, “Yeah, no, thanks mate.” his thoughts were whirling out of control.

_“So, what’s he doing driving a car around the countryside in France?” the caller mused aloud._

“I don’t know, thanks.” then he disconnected and had gone back to breakfast.

Now he was at the table and Jim was watching him closely and he could feel his anger bubbling to the surface. He was nearly at the end of his rope and that innocently smug look on Jim’s face was not helping.

“Seba-” he didn’t have the chance to finish.

“ _NO_.” Jim’s eyes flashed at his tone and he felt a momentary wave of satisfaction. “No, you don’t get to do this. Not now, not this time.”

Jim arched his eyebrows, “Excuse me?”

“You heard me. I want answers Jim and so help me God, if I don’t get the correct ones, I will walk through that door and you can fuck right off.”  Sebastian could hear the way his voice caught at the end and he hated it but the white hot anger that was burning in his chest at the moment fueled him.

Jim had sat back now and crossed his arms over his chest, a small smile on his lips and Sebastian hated him in this moment. He was so tired of the constant and unnecessary lies, it never ended with this man.

“What exactly is it that seems to have you so worked up, darling?”

Sebastian thought it would be a miracle if he didn’t punch him he was always so fucking arrogant and so certain that Sebastian was totally under his thumb, that was about to end.

 “Why are we going after Janine?” he asked and he kept his voice low.  

Jim sighed and closed his eyes for a second before responding, “I’ve told you- she has-”

“ _NO_.” Sebastian stared him down and didn’t even blink, his fury seemed to be egging him on and the more Jim lied the angrier he became.

“ _Yes_..she is trying to have me in court and she wants nothing more than to see me hang. She wants me to answer for what happened with Ric-”

Sebastian slammed his fist so hard on the table that a piece of the wood splintered and stuck in his hand causing blood to ooze hotly over his flesh, he didn’t take any notice. “FOR FUCK’S SAKE JIM TELL ME THE TRUTH!” he was standing and couldn’t remember doing so, “for once, just one time Jim, one _God_ _damn_ _time_ , that’s all I’m asking...don’t lie to me.”

Jim had pushed himself away from the table and actually had the decency to look frightened. “Sebastian, I think you need to calm do-” he never had the chance to finish his sentence because Sebastian had picked up the mug he had been drinking coffee from only moments ago and threw it against the far wall where it shattered into a million pieces while lukewarm coffee splashed everywhere. He took an enormous deep breath and turned back to face a silent and staring Jim. In fairness, Sebastian had never lost his temper like this, not with Jim and he felt a little better watching the look of uncertainty mingled with fright on the other man’s face.

“This ends Jim, it bloody ends right bloody now. D’you understand me?” Jim stayed silent and nodded, “Good,” he leaned on the table with both hands leaving a blood smear under his right palm. “Start over then. Tell me what’s goin’ on here and remember, if I doubt a single fucken syllable that comes out of your lyin’ mouth then I’m gone and you can go fuck yourself.”

Jim stayed silent a moment longer as he watched the rage simmering in Sebastian’s eyes. The man was a killer and a very efficient one at that so, until now, Jim had believed that Sebastian was more like a machine than a man and he didn’t allow emotions to rule him, he had been wrong. Sebastian watched as Jim made up his mind and he knew, deep in his bones, that he was resolved. He would walk away and never even glance back if he wasn’t satisfied with the explanation which he was about to receive. He was finished being lied to.

Jim blinked once and then began speaking in a dead sort of voice, “Richard always _did_ harass me as a child, I haven’t lied about that. We never got on and, frankly, we never will but, we needed each other, regardless of how much we each hated that thought.”

“What d’you mean? Why would you _need_ each other?”

“His parents were positively horrid people, he was very much abused at home and I was the only one who ever knew. I only knew because I had been staying there once when my parents had gone to take Janine on a short holiday and I had refused to go along so I was sent to Richard’s.” a look passed over his features that caused Sebastian to momentarily forget his anger and want to reach out to the man, a moment later his face had gone hard and blank once more and Sebastian resumed listening.

“I felt... _sad_...for him once I witnessed it. The way his father treated him, the way he hit him. It made me really angry and I had forgotten the way things were between us and I went to his room afterwards. Richard was angry at me for mentioning it and he tried to hit me but I had plenty of experience dodging his fists and he couldn’t catch me. He came to me later, with tears in his eyes, eyes which were both blackened. He asked for my help. We made a deal.”

Sebastian had become so caught up in the story that he’d stopped feeling so angry and he’d begun to feel the pain in his wrist and hand now so he wrapped it in a dish cloth and sat down to listen.

“I agreed to help him, we were children, I was very different then. We agreed that I would offer my assistance and he would keep his ogre-like mates away from me so I could study in peace at school. He agreed and we parted company for a short time. It was the following summer that he came away with my family to the sea. Janine and I had grown very far apart and I’m sure we both felt that we didn’t know one another at all any more. Regardless, it was then that my plan was to be put into action. Richie was always an actor which was part of the reason that his father hated him so and we came up with the idea to fake his death over the cliff.”

Sebastian sat back, his hand was really beginning to throb now, “So, the two of you, just lads, pulled off this great scheme and pretended that he’d fallen to his death? How?”

Jim smirked, “It was not all quite as simple as I’m painting it now but trust me, we succeeded. Janine always suspected me and it was she who planted the idea in everyone’s minds that I might’ve been behind his tragic fall. Well, as I’m sure you already know, there was never enough evidence to actually bring the case to a trial and so we’ve moved on.” he paused and sipped his tea which by now must’ve gone cold, his eyes sparkled as he surveyed Sebastian. “Anyway, we hid him away for a while. It wasn’t easy but we made do and eventually, when he was old enough, he went out on his own under an assumed name. As I said earlier, Janine was always convinced that I had something to do with Richie’s death. She wasn’t wrong.”

Sebastian scratched his jaw with his uninjured hand, “Alright, so what does she have to gain by dredging this all back up again now? I mean, if she tries to have the case re-opened all you need to do is present him, Richard.”

Jim was slowly shaking his head before Sebastian had even finished speaking, “Nah. You see, darling, if Richard were to come back from the dead it would cause all sorts of problems. Currently, we are working to secure the large life insurance policy of his parents. His father died several years ago and his mum just passed very recently. I am the sole beneficiary as she never cared for my dear sister and they never had any other children. If he were to suddenly reappear it would make things….rather uncomfortable.”

Sebastian was quiet as he thought it all through and then finally he looked up from his mottled and clotting hand. “So, how does Janine stand to benefit from ruining this?”

“She doesn’t, not really. She just enjoys causing trouble, as you know well.”

“Okay, well, what does she have then that might cause trouble?”

“Photographs. Of Richard. I had designed everything so that when I received the money he would have his share and then he could pop off somewhere, anywhere, so long as it was far away. He got cocky and began showing his face so I was forced to put him on my payroll and that’s how he became my driver. Even though it has been so long since Janine had seen him and he’d only been a boy when she’d last done so, we even took the precaution of using makeup to make him appear older than he was on the off chance that he’d be recognized.”

Sebastian sighed, “She is clever. Far cleverer than you give her credit for.”

“Are you telling me that this is my fault? That I have... _failed_?”  Jim was incredulous.

“Hardly. I just wish you’d understand that she is _your_ sister and I wish you would stop lying to me so that I could do my fucken job without wondering when and where the next obstacle will be.”

They were both silent then and Sebastian felt that maybe, just maybe, he had actually gotten through to this arsehole for a change. At least, he really hoped so.

Finally Jim stood and came to where he was sitting, his injured and bloody hand in his lap. He looked down and wrinkled his nose. “You probably need a few sutures there dear.”

Sebastian glanced at his hand that refused to stop bleeding, “Yeah, you wanna do it?”

Jim arched his dark eyebrows in disbelief, “God no! I don’t like getting my hands dirty.”

Sebastian just rolled his eyes and stood up, kissing Jim once on his forehead he headed off to the bathroom to clean and stitch his hand.

Just as he was turning the water on he heard Jim call from the other room, "And don't forget to clean the mess you've made in your tantrum!"

He called back, "Fuck off!"


	13. Chapter 13

It was raining, and cold, as usual. The sky reflected Sebastian’s thoughts at the moment while he laid in bed listening to the patter of the drops on the glass. The man next to him sighed in his sleep and rolled over, one of his icy cold feet draped across Sebastian’s shins making him twitch. He hadn’t slept much the previous night and he was replaying events in his head at the moment. He couldn’t help the slight blush that rose in his cheeks.

They’d argued, they’d made up and at the end of it all Sebastian still hated himself as much as he hated Jim. It was difficult, _really_ difficult for him to allow people in and he continually allowed Jim in and he was continually let down for it. He sighed and covered his eyes with his hand and felt a dull throb and slight sting from the small cut which he’d stitched and covered with a sterile white bandage and tape. The man drove him to the brink of destruction and yet, he simply couldn’t walk away no matter how often he threatened to do exactly that.

“Hmm, what are you thinking about, tiger?” His voice was soft and low with a hint of a rasp from sleep still hanging on at the edges. Sebastian didn’t immediately lower his arm but he couldn’t stop the slow smile spreading across his face. He rolled over and wrapped his arms around Jim’s smaller body and drew him in close as he kissed his ruffled hair.

He murmured, “Oh, just thinking about all the ways that I could kill you.” in response.

Jim laughed once, “Yeah? What’s your favorite one then?”

“Oh, well, I guess I’d have to say asphyxiation. My hands belong around your throat after all.”

Jim smiled widely and tipped his head back, Sebastian took the opportunity to kiss him. He was soft at first and then he brought one hand up to the man’s jaw and held him there while he rolled himself on top and continued kissing with intensity. Jim pulled away first and laid breathlessly smiling up at Sebastian.

“What is actually on your mind my love?”

Sebastian cocked his head to one side and looked thoughtful, “You,” he responded, “always you.” and it was the most honest statement he’d ever uttered.

Jim laughed again and sat up to bring their lips together again. It wasn’t long until they were wrapped around one another, all tousled hair and breathless kissing. Jim had slid his hands low to Sebastian’s arse and squeezed which caused Sebastian to bite playfully at Jim’s lower lip. The two were equally aroused and Sebastian was about to dip his head lower to Jim’s neck with the intention of sliding even lower and then wrapping his lips around the man’s hard-on. Just as he moved to the right of Jim’s mouth however, he stopped him.

Jim held Sebastian’s head in his hands and looked deeply into his eyes, Sebastian almost found it difficult to return the gaze, like looking directly into the sun he wanted to avert his eyes. He had expected him to say something meaningful and, indeed, it appeared that he wanted to but somewhere in his magnificent brain Jim chose to keep his silence. He held Sebastian a moment longer and then he forced his way forward and sat up.

“I’ve a lot of work to do, and so do you love.”

Sebastian sighed and closed his eyes as he sat naked on the bed, surrounded by the messed and twisted blankets. “What have I got to do today, boss?” he asked sarcastically.

Jim reached his arms high above his head as he stretched and then he turned to look over his shoulder at Sebastian, “We’ll talk after our shower.”

That was all it took and Sebastian was on his feet, directly behind Jim who had just turned on the steaming hot water. Sebastian grabbed the man by his wrist just before he stepped into the water and he pressed him back into the wall. He brought both hands up and placed them on either side of Jim’s face, he wanted to make sure that he was forced to look into Sebastian’s eyes.

“Jim, I…” he began and his voice caught, he cleared his throat and tried again. “Jim, I know we’ve been through a lot and I _know_ that I have let you down a time or two in the past.” Jim snorted at that and Sebastian rolled his eyes. “I just-I just need you to know that I may get bloody _furious_ with you sometimes, but...well-” Jim stopped him speaking when he reached his hands out and gently caressed the tense muscles of Sebastian’s back and shoulders, he gently trailed his fingers across the raised scars there. Sebastian loosened his hold on Jim and Jim took the moment to lean forward and pull Sebastian’s naked body closer to his, he leaned his forehead against Sebastian’s and said something that made Sebastian’s knees go weak.

“I love you, you pig headed arse.” then he closed the space between them and covered Sebastian’s mouth with his own.

Sebastian responded but it was an automatic thing, he was still trying with all his might to understand what he’d heard. _I love you_. Three words. Three tiny little words and Sebastian felt like he was spinning. He was brought around by Jim taking his dangling hand and leading him into the shower.

The water was hot and made him flinch at first but it served the purpose of making Sebastian’s body respond. His skin felt hot and cold all at once and suddenly he couldn’t stand the thought of not having Jim’s smaller body wrapped in his arms. He grabbed the man around the waist and pulled him in tightly which caused them both to slide a bit on the wet tile floor. Jim laughed into Sebastian’s mouth and brought a hand up to the nape of his neck and held onto his short wet hair. Sebastian brought his hand up to smooth away the lock of dark hair that had fallen into Jim’s face and eyes.

He felt so- _happy_ \- something that was foreign to him, it was an emotion that Sebastian was unfamiliar with. He enjoyed the way his chest felt and how his head just kept repeating the words over and over, _I love you_.

Sebastian opened his eyes then and found himself with his back to the wall as Jim slid his hands over Sebastian’s scarred and wet torso. Goose flesh arose all over his body and his nipples became instantly hard at the touch. Jim smiled wickedly and then leaned forward to kiss and lick his aroused body. The man’s tongue and his touch were magical, in every single way, it was the only thing Sebastian lived for, he decided.

Jim licked the sensitive skin of his pecs and slid lower to his abdomen and then to his navel at which point he had sunk to his knees and held on with both hands firmly grasping Sebastian’s narrow hips. Sebastian took a deep and wavering breath and watched every move that Jim made. It was difficult to believe that only twenty four hours ago they had been having a row and Sebastian was prepared to walk away from it all.

He suddenly gasped aloud and swallowed some water as he felt Jim lick his cock from the base to the head in a slow, tantalizing motion. His breathing had turned shallow and hurried and Jim gently moved his free hand to Sebastian’s balls and squeezed lightly before moving his mouth low to suck and lick at his highly sensitive skin. Sebastian kept his hands splayed on the wall behind him. This was too fucking amazing and he didn’t want to ruin it, so he let the man work.

Jim’s mouth was soft yet eager as he tongued over the tender skin causing Sebastian to moan and push his hips forward from the wall. He could barely stay still, he wanted to thrust forward and force Jim to take his whole cock into his mouth and thankfully he didn’t have to wait much longer. Jim slowly moved back up to the hard length that was Sebastian’s cock just above him and after just nipping and sucking at the tip for a moment he slid it in to his mouth and swirled his tongue along the veins  and taught skin as he did; Sebastian couldn’t control the pleased little groan that escaped him and he also couldn’t remain still any longer so he put both hands at the back of the man’s dark, wet head and made him move a bit faster.

The water continued to spray hotly down on them and Sebastian had to wipe it from his eyes several times so he could clearly watch the man on his knees sucking his dick.

He could feel himself getting there, reaching the point when his knees would go weak and his whole body would tingle with sensation and then he’d come and his breathing would get shorter and faster and then eventually slow and return to normal.

“Jesus! Ji-” the shout was cut off by his gasping as he held on to Jim’s shoulders as he leaned back and let the water run cleanly over his face and then he stood and placed his hands at Sebastian’s hips after he brushed his dark hair back and away from his beautiful face.

Sebastian brought a hand up to his jaw and moved forward to kiss him softly on his perfectly formed mouth. He pulled away a moment later but continued to press his forehead against Jim’s, “I love you too, you prick.” Jim smiled and kissed him one last time before turning and getting out of the steamy shower.

* * *

 

Less than an hour later, when they were both dressed and groomed, Jim explained what was about to happen.

Sebastian must wait at the flat until Jim phoned him, Jim and Richard were going to finally lure Janine from her hidey-hole, all thanks to Irene with minimal help from Mary. Once Richard and Jim had removed Janine then it was up to Sebastian to go into her place and take the evidence, which Irene had assured Jim would be there in a safe which she also was able to get the code for.

Jim said he would be in touch and that he would hand deliver his dearest sister to Sebastian so that he could finish the job he’d started. Sebastian was uneasy and he told Jim so but all he received was a kiss on his freshly shaved cheek and a soft murmur of reassurance which did nothing to actually make him feel better.

Much sooner than Sebastian was prepared Jim was heading out the door in response to a text from his cousin that he’d arrived for him. Jim grabbed Sebastian by the lapels of his coat at the door and tilted his head sweetly as he looked up at him. His eyes were so dark they almost seemed black; Sebastian had to fight the urge to hold him tightly and refuse to allow him to leave.

“Be good tiger, aye?” he asked playfully as he tugged Sebastian forward.

“I don’t know how to be anything else, love.” he answered and then he kissed him and it felt wrong for the first time ever, it felt entirely wrong.

A moment later Jim had turned and was gone leaving Sebastian alone with his fear and anxiety. It was going to feel like an eternity as he waited for the word from Jim which was why he nearly jumped out of his skin fifteen minutes later when his mobile buzzed from his trouser pocket.

He pulled it out and read the message on the display. To say he was unprepared would be a grave understatement.

_~Pls Seb, this is URGENT! I NEED your help!! He is in mortal danger!!~ J_

His brain was sluggish and just as he was about to type a reply the phone began vibrating in his palm as he received an incoming call.

Hesitantly, he answered. “Yes.”

The voice was frantic and it belonged to Janine, “Seb!! We _HAVE_ to help him!”


End file.
